Friday, March 7, 2008

Seriously check this band out and go to their show tonight if you're in the DC/Baltimore area. For more info go see the Constitutional.

Hank Baskett Will Teach Your Children

Philadelphia Eagle wide receiver Hank Baskett has found a way to keep himself busy this offseason, he'll be teaching a sociology of sport course at Clovis Community College. Despite having never taught any course in his life or even having a degree in sociology, Baskett was tapped to teach the course by the sociology department head Ruthie Hefner.

She said Baskett did not immediately sign up for the course, but spent time making sure he had the proper background to teach the class.

She said he picked out the textbook for the class, and she designed the curriculum around his particular experience.

“He spent about four or five months reading the topics,” she said. “And he started reading and deciding whether or not his credentials were a match.”

Man, who wouldn't want to pay money for a course taught by a football player with no credentials other than reading a book for four or five months...and playing football. I can't imagine why just 8 people have signed up for this 30 person course, this has got to be the easiest guaranteed "A" course in any school's history. That's even counting the African American Popular Music course I took at school where my final exam was a very bad play demonstrating my incredibly poor dancing abilities. Oh yea, that was money well spent.

The good news is that Eagles fans have a new nickname they can give Baskett...The Professor!

From CNJOnline

Wear This Mask And Get Swiftly Beat Down

This mask is actually for sale. The website says the mask is "[d]esigned to help protect against facial injuries. Total padding on both sides". It should also come with a guarantee that whomever your opponent is will kick your ass quickly and violently. If you have to wear this mask, you shouldn't be participating in whatever sport you're playing, plain and simple.

I'm not even sure why this mask is even designed like it is, what is the point of the gigantic eye holes? What's up with that chinstrap? Who actually wears this crap? So many angry...

You have to love Craigslist for this reason

Random Video of Horrific Violence: "Failed Wall Flip"

This just did not go well

Backflip-goes-wrong - Funny videos are here

Bonus Video: Balls To The Face

This made me laugh, i dunno if it is the build up to the final blow but its funny, damn funny when it happens. At least it was to me in my slightly inebriated state. Happy friday you poopers.

Constituional Vol "Free Publicity"

I'll be up in Baltimore tonight at Rams Head Live on the Inner Harbor watching my sister's band Laredo do their thing at 8pm (doors at 7pm). Anyone who wants to help her out and show some support, do go and check them out and look for me wearing a black Laredo shirt. Go to their Myspace page and listen to their stuff, ya got 4 pretty sweet rock songs on their for your morning. It's Friday and a mostly slow "news" week comes to a virtual close but if Mustafa ever gets his internet fixed at home we might see some weekend posting here, so stay tuned. Until then...welcome to the Constitutional.

  • Here's a whole list of NFL players who have tried MMA Fighting. Bodog Life Fight Files

  • Chad Johnson took a swing at Marvin Lewis and hit him in the eye! DAMN! The Sporting Blog

  • John Gruden is caddying for John Daly...wonder if they go for drinks after? Fox Sports

  • Here's some photos of some athletes out in the real world. I hope this is a regular feature. EBSports Blog

  • Pat Riley stepping away to scout? What? Another year he won't coach for a full season...I wish I could step away from my job as often as he does.Sedano Show

  • Freshman wrestler takes people down...with one arm. Scott Van Pelt Style

  • Johnny Unitas will train children how to kill. I wish i thought of scanning these first. Kudos guys. Food Court Lunch

  • Former Yankee takes 'roids...but for the RIGHT reasons. Steroid Nation

  • Here's a Q&A for the upcoming Lebowskifest. Randball

  • Is there really an NBA ROY contest going on right now? Legend of Cecilio Guante

  • NBA Teams as TV Shows. With Malice

  • This is a "good" point. Introducing Liston

  • Really, what are the Jets thinking? Rumors And Rants

  • 11 ways the Favre retirement has been totally overblown. Epic Carnival

Looks like Seinfeld wants back on much for going out on top

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Four Square Is Not Just For Kids Anymore

The World Championships of Four Square just occurred up in Maine a couple weeks ago in yet another childhood sport that has gone "adult". There actually is an organization that helps people set up their own community leagues and hosts the World Championships called If you happen to live in the Boston area, you can sign up for their own league right online.

I used to rock at four square on the asphalt playgrounds of my youth, but it looks like their rules have taken away the many different ways we cheated hit the ball. No atom bombs or super spin in this league. The dork level seems about on par with the kickball leagues that have sprung up all over, which isn't a bad thing if you're a dork and you're trying to get laid. Still intrigued? Watch the highlights of the 2008 World Championships below.

The Only Way To Take Out A Streaker

He should have taken the bat to the dude's neck as a finishing blow. Watch the video of this...

From Daily Mail UK

Tuesday, March 4, 2008


That is about the only thing that came to mind when I was watching this video. I'm only posting it to ruin you all like I was and because it's all about sports. This is, with out a doubt, the worst piece of synth-pop I have ever witnessed. The only saving grace is it is intentionally bad and part of Tim & Eric's Awesome show. God it is horrible though. So, with those warnings, enjoy SPORTS!

Fantasty Football Site Screws Customers

The old axiom of "if it seems too good to be true, it probably is" still holds water. The American Fantasy Football League promised it's league winners $500,000 in prize money for people signing up, paying for their site and participating in their leagues. Unfortunately for the people who signed up for this site, the AFFL has no money and cannot pay it's winners.

The site was set up in such a way as to get around the Unlawful Internet Gambling Enforcement Act which effectively prevents gambling online by stating the prize money up front. The bad thing is, they never got enough people to sign up to justify the gigantic payout and now still owe $475,000 in prize money payouts to its customers. Too make it worse, they have $850,000 in current liabilities with no cash coming in to save them yet.

"The problem is that we front-loaded money as entry fees came in. I shouldn’t have assumed we were going to get a certain level of growth. Had we known we weren’t going to get the growth, we wouldn’t have made software changes. Then, we wouldn’t have set the prizes as high as we did. People think we’re running away with the money. We’re not running away with any money; it went to the business.”

Whoops. Looks like they overestimated things a little bit. They should have followed another old axiom "Promises are like babies: fun to make, but hell to deliver."

Story from Fantasy Fanatics

Random Video of Horrific Violence: Treadmill Handstand

Yea um...don't try this at home kids. Man, do face plants ever get old?

Monday, March 3, 2008

MLB Strikes Out Online Coverage

MLB baseball is now following in NFL's heavy handed footsteps by limiting the amount of coverage online news outlets can give to their sport. Why would baseball want to limit all the free advertising that news outlets give their sport? Money of course. Online news outlets will now only be able to have no more than seven photos from any games and cannot create a photo gallery from those images (so long Yahoo Sports and galleries) . Also, no more than two minutes of audio/visual footage can be posted about a game and the only site that can post highlights are those who have a deal with MLB Advanced Media (so long YouTube clips). This more than likely means to get all the coverage of the sport that fans are used to, they will have to go to

Heavyhanded? Yup. In one way, this deal is better than the NFL's policy with respect to the amount of a/v footage, MLB is somewhat charitable giving 2 minutes compared to the NFL's 45 seconds, but still it is pretty bad. What really hurts is the "no more slideshows of games" and just 7 photos. That is a bad bad idea and even the NFL doesn't have that policy.

Baseball is a beautiful game to watch in photographs and so many plays come to life when captured in a still frame, the public will lose out when it cannot see all the pictures of a game. Not that anyone but us bloggers scour the photo galleries for timeless photos that people might have missed, but where does this leave individual's photo galleries? The rules, for now, seem to be just for news outlets, but how long will it be before the pseudo news outlets like us blogs or social sites like Flickr are targeted?

It will be interesting to see how this affects the big boys' coverage of the sport. Perhaps they will be less forthcoming to give MLB as much coverage as they used to. Baseball isn't the NFL, it needs all the good free publicity it can get and by biting the hand that feeds, they might not get fed as much as they used to.

From Ars Technica

If Griffey Caught This, He Would Have Broken All The Bones In His Body

This catch is better than pretty much any Major League Baseball catch ever. That's right, I said it. Wow.

Constitutional Vol. "Times Are A Changin"

Big weekend for NFL free agency, I'm sure plenty of sites will have round-ups of those events so you probably won't find much about it here. We deal with the minutiae of sports so that kinda in depth analysis you should look elsewhere for. But keep coming back for our normal crap. Big weekend for the Chimp as well, I popped the question to my gal and she said yes, so I'm soon to be a married man, in a year or so at least. Go me. Here's some links to get you through your Monday...welcome to the Constitutional.

  • Pitchfork Media will pick use their indie snobbery to pick music for 2kSports new baseball videogame. GameIndustry

  • Broncos' Marcus Thomas arrested for possession. Rocky Mountain News

  • Whats worse than Savage Speedball? Well, Speed Pool of course. FanIQ

  • Ryan Church is a whiny bitch. Captiol Punishment

  • In case you missed it, Michigan's womens basketball coach goes NUTS in a post game interview. You must see it. Gold, Jerry. Gold. Sportscolumn Blog

  • Collection of odd baseball youtubes. On 205th

  • All about the Jason Taylor situation. <a href="