Friday, March 30, 2007

Starbury: The Aldi of Shoes

Lebron James doesn't think much of Starbury's cheap-ass shoes.

Nike pitchman LeBron James credited Stephon Marbury for coming up with his discount Starbury line of shoes, but said he didn't think Nike would follow suit.

"I think me being with Nike, we hold our standards high, we do a great job putting out great merchandise," he said before the game. "Great shoes, that's part of a price that's pretty high, but at the same time you're getting great quality for it."
We make our Malaysian kids pump out 12 pairs an hour. Find a higher standard in the shoe industry. We dare you.

Thursday, March 29, 2007

You've Been Hit By A Smooth Pedophile

First the NBA All-Star game and now Michael Jackson. It's not clear how much more Las Vegas can take. Michael Jackson is in talks to build a 50 foot robot of himself to roam the desert around Las Vegas. The robot would shoot lasers beams which would be visible not only to people on the ground but also anyone flying into the city.

This robot must never be built. Anyone who believes this robot is for entertainment purposes is delusional. Think how far a 50 foot robot will be able to see. The lasers would target little boys like Tranzor Z and Michael would have his driver race him to their location and snatch them. He's already laid out his master plan.

Dan Snyder must be involved with this project. Lil' Dan Dan can invest in the robot and if it's successful, he can build a 100 foot robot of himself to roam Landover, MD and shoot lasers at Redskins fans who try to park in parking lots that aren't owned by him. Don't be surprised if the robot "mistakenly" destroys the Landover Metro station like the Chinese embassy in Belgrade.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Tomas Rosicky Taxes That Ass Like The Government

It's Saturday Night. Ain't a damn thing funny...Nobody knows how to celebrate a loss like Tomas Rosicky (Arsenal/Czech Republic).

Rosicky was caught along with four teammates in a hotel room with six hookers after a Euro 2008 qualifier loss to Germany on Saturday. The players claimed the hookers were autograph seekers. It's not at all ironic that they were nailed by a female journalist posing as an autograph seeker.

She knocked on the hotel room door which was answered by Jan Polak. Before being sent away, she saw the other players getting liquored and hugging the hookers.

She returned with a photographer which caused a player to yell,"Idiot! If someone took a picture of this, we'd be right in the shit!" Rosicky bent a hooker over the couch and yelled, "My best sincerity friend, I already am up in the shit! Get it?!".

OK, maybe he didn't say that, but the journalist didn't believe his excuse that he was dotting the "i" in Rosicky on a hooker's ass. Perhaps it was the fact that he was yelling "ramming speed!" at the same time.