Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Actual Sports Cereals You Didn't Know Existed

these have no flavor at all

known to cause kidney failure

loses consistency in seconds

might cause irritability and feelings of unstableness

all flash no substance

you will suck if you eat this

might have used Chinese wheat gluten as filler ingredient to make it seem mo' better than it really was

good, but not as good as people thought

expensive. but didn't deliver any satisfaction

may cause weight gain*

so try these and watch his new tv show*

*These Shaq snacks aren't cereal but crackers, i just liked the boxes. Everything else, actual cereal you can buy...somewhere.

20 comments:

WinningTheTurnoverBattle said...

I LOL'D

Chimpanzee Rage said...

if i could find an emoticon to display my joy, i would use it here

Anonymous said...

Do the Hokie Toasties come with a free Michael Vick dogfighting starter kit?

Chimpanzee Rage said...

hahaha, hilarious anonymous. Maybe they should come with a free Marcus Vick...if anyone will take him.

Anonymous said...

What about Flutie Flakes?

doug said...

If you know about Flutie Flakes then they do not belong on a list of cereals that "you did not know existed"!

Chimpanzee Rage said...

Took the words right outta my mouth Doug! We all know Flutie Flakes!

Ivan Bravo said...

http://www.plbsports.com/ProductPgs/products_bettis.htm

http://www.plbsports.com/products.htm


Some pretty good sites with all Sports foods.

Chimpanzee Rage said...

Ivan, that link is strong. Thanks

seth said...

if you haven't seen it, this page has a whole bunch of pro athlete food products, for instance, i was unaware that there is a line of ed mccaffrey mustards.

http://www.plbsports.com/index.htm

JSwerdy said...

you forgot MarinO's

http://www.plbsports.com/images/Products/MarinoCereal.jpg

Henry said...

http://www.plbsports.com/products.htm

This site has all the WASHED OUT stars and their products.

Chrebet Crunch - gotta love it

Doberman on the Diamond said...

Hmmm, "Nolan Ryan Steak Sauce Cap" is on clearance. Color me surprised.

Chimpanzee Rage said...

They jumped the gun with those Tommy Gun Flakes huh?

micah said...

i definitely have some moss' magic crunch in my basement. seriously.

five pound bag said...

Hokie Toasties are perfect for the munchies

-Hove said...

Hull-O's (from Brett Hull's time with the Dallas Stars.) Still have a box.

Chimpanzee Rage said...

@Micah
the cereal is in your basement or some sort of hallucenagenic crunchy moss growing in the corner?

Anonymous said...

Don't forget about Buckeye Heroes. According to his bio on the back, Anthony Schleigel enjoys killing wild hogs with a steak knife. True story.

http://www.plbsports.com/images/Products/Buckeye-Heroes.jpg

Lou P. said...

I remember seeing that Randy Moss cereal in Huntington, WV (where Marshall is located) in early 2000. Unfortunately I didn't buy any at the store when I saw them, and by the next time I returned, they were gone.