Why The Hell Not? Yes We All Canseco

Jose Canseco2
Let’s get something out of the way. Not knowing about stuff has never been an impediment to holding political office. Who cares if Jose Canseco doesn’t know how he would raise revenues without raising taxes let alone how to become a Canadian citizen? This should in no way prevent him from being mayor of Toronto.

The Star reports that Canseco is interested in replacing Rob Ford as mayor of Toronto.

“Can’t do enough on council,” Canseco, 48, wrote on Twitter. “I hear you are getting rid of mayor Ford on Monday. I love Toronto and will be glad to replace him.”

He outlined his potential platform in tweets to the Star at 1:17 a.m. on Friday. “Ford too much trouble to be effective,” he wrote. “Gotta fix budget, traffic, get new $ not from taxes, get more new businesses, and help schools.”

Ford could get bounced from office on Monday after being found guilty of violating the Municipal Conflicts of Interest Act.

An interim mayor could be appointed by the City Council but the better option would be a byelection. Imagine the debates leading up to the election. Canseco, IKEA monkey, Snow, Yunel Escobar, and Jarious Jackson would make for the best debate since Admiral Stockdale ran away with the 1992 Vice-Presidential debate.

There is the problem of the Canadian citizenship requirement but not knowing shit never stopped Canseco in the past. No reason for that to change.

Canseco, born in Cuba, is an American citizen, and, thus, ineligible to run in Toronto. But in another tweet to the Star, he said he plans to “work out the citizen thing.” His agent, Jose Melendez, added in an email that Canseco is not taking the matter lightly.

“He is serious about a run but as you know he doesn’t know the procedure for citizenship,” Melendez wrote.

If Gerard Depardieu can change citizenship with an executive order, Canseco can do the same. Yes I am implying that Canada works the same as Russia. Stephen Harper hates freedom like Putin.

Perhaps it would help Canseco’s case if he offered to donate a portion of his Ponce de Canseco anti-aging drink proceeds to the city of Toronto. Never mind that it doesn’t exist. His Twitter pleas to Donald Trump, Warren Buffett and Mark Cuban should be all the assurance anyone needs to know that it’s real.

Help a brotha out, America Jr.

H/T to Bruce Arthur

Update: Daniel Dale of the Star reports that Canseco is already waffling on the citizenship issue. Who will step up and save his fledgling candidacy? Anvil? Howie Mandel? Jason Priestley? Sum 41? Nah, Dream Warriors.

I sure as heck didn’t realize that the MLB season started yesterday, did you?  Well it did…for two teams at least. To my surprise, yesterday, when I was clicking around the interwebs, I saw a box score showing that Seattle beat Oakland, 3-1, and now is the only team in baseball with a win because that game was a regular season game. Like a full on regular season win. In March.


Oh, see, Bud Selig, in all his genius,  thought that this year would be the fourth time in history that the Major League Baseball season should open up in Japan. They call the series the “Season Opener” (not exactly the same ring as Opening Day but who am I to complain, huh?) and the first game wasn’t even nationally televised, unless you count MLB’s own cable network MLBN if you happened to be lucky enough to have it and to be able to skip work and tune in at 9am on Wednesday. To be honest, i’m not even sure if they advertised this game anywhere because I sure as heck didn’t see anything for it.

I mean, I am all for spreading the game of baseball around the world and yes, the Mariners are owned by a Japanese company (Nintendo) but c’mon, shouldn’t the first game of the 2012 season have a little bit of fanfare  and especially be in its country of origin? ESPN’s own website still has a countdown to MLB’s Opening Day for crying out loud.  How can we have Opening Day now that the season is already WIDE FRIGGIN OPEN? No other American sport starts its season out this way and I would venture to say there is a BIG reason for that…because it is stupid.

Oh and what else makes little sense about this series? The games are considered home games for Oakland, aka “The team not owned by a Japanese corporation“, aka “The team  no one in the crowd is rooting for because they are not owned by a Japanese corporation and are without a national hero in Ichiro that the entire crowd loves and reveres“,  meaning they lose two home games in Oakland this season.

Yeah that is fair, huh? Couldn’t make this imaginary home series for Oakland an imaginary home and away series for both teams? Just to even things out a little? Just a little?  No, no of course not, that would make WAY too much sense.

Then again, I don’t often expect MLB to make much sense anymore…I mean home field advantage is still tied to a stupid All-Star game.  Ugh.  Now, there is a whole other rant…



Ryan Braun Tumbles Away An Inside The Park Home Run

Inside the park home runs are not a common occurrance in Major League Baseball and Milwaukee Brewers’ outfielder Ryan Braun was ohhhhhhh so close to getting his very first one. He could’ve had it quite easily actually, but for the little tumble you are about to see Braun take after he rounds third and attempts to make his way home. Poor guy, I would almost feel bad for him if I wasn’t laughing so hard right now.

As the great Maxwell Smart would’ve  said, “Missed it by that much.

To add insult to injury, the Brewers lost the game to the St. Louis Cardinals by a score of 8-3.

Random sports trivia while we’re talking about inside the park home runs, who is the MLB leader in inside the park home runs? A player named Jesse Burkett with 55 inside the park home runs. Burkett played for the Giants, Spiders, Perfectos, Cardinals, Browns and, his last team, the Boston Americans from 1890-1905. He was inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame in 1946.  Ty Cobb and Honus Wagner are both tied for 3rd with 46 inside the parkers. Honestly, no one on the list of top 25 inside the park home run hitters was born in the 1900s. Lost art I guess…or fielding has gotten a LOT better these days.

Trivia from Baseball-Almanac.com

A Baseball Rose Not Named Pete

Ok, so this is a day late for Valentines day, but better late than never.  Say you want to get your special baseball loving girlfriend something special, but don’t want to go with the typical bouquet of roses.  Well, this guy Mark Ellingson came up with an interesting idea to cut away the leather from a baseball, and arrange it into a rose.  Thus was born…The Baseball Rose.  A three pack of roses will set you back $29.99.  Considering official MLB basballs will set you back $12.99 apiece, this isn’t so bad is it? I dunno, maybe it is.

Check out this video about the guy and try to guess if he has smoked ANY weed at ALL before this interview.

As a matter of fact, today is Susan B. Anthony day!  I think that a 3 pack of baseball roses would be the perfect gift to send your beloved in celebration of such a romantic holiday.

Certainly a lot nicer than getting your significant other this baseball rose….


Congratulations to the Texas Rangers on making their first World Series appearance. As an Orioles fan, it’s great to know that two expansion teams and a bankrupt team have made it there since they last did. I digress.

There was some kind of justice in the fact that A-Rod went down looking for the last out of the ALCS. He’s going to have a much more confused look the next time he makes out with his reflection in the mirror.

The Rangers’ dominant series win also was a great way to send Yankees fans home knowing Joe Girardi managed an XXL Chalupa switch better than Game 6. Baseball couldn’t say goodbye to a “classier” set of fans. What are we talking about? Where do we start?

How about homophobic songs in the bleachers?

It’s like Boston minus the racism. The Yankees promised to put a stop to it but it’s suspect they didn’t do anything about it until they were called out. Only if they policed bigotry as much as they crack down on anyone moving during the 7th inning stretch.

Let’s go to Game 2 of the ALCS when Yankees fans started pelting the Rangers bullpen with trash since their team was down 8-0 and playing like garbage. Video via Big League Stew and Crossing Broad.

Not enough proof for you? How about a Yankees fan trying to throw beer on Cal Ripken Jr. before Game 4. He somehow avoided the shower. He hasn’t moved that fast since the mid to late 80s. He probably called Peter Angelos and said he can still play over Manny Alexander. Unfortunately there’s no video of David Wells trying to save the spilt beer.

Manager “Uncle” Ron Washington deserves credit for outmanaging Girardi and getting the most out of his journeyman pitchers and Cliff Lee. It was a decisive win to close out the series despite the umpire’s best efforts to save the game for the Yankees in the 5th inning with an awful call that Joe West would have saluted.

Celebrate how you want, Uncle Ron. You still have a World Series to play but for a day, do yours.

If it’s good enough for God, it’s good enough for you. Hell what the people say.