The one where Florio manufactures a controversy

Devotees to this website will quickly learn that we cast a skeptical eye to our fellow writers who seem to relish each and every opportunity to enhance their own celebrity and become yet another “personality” of the Trent-Dilfer-Mark-Schlereth cast. Thus, Profootballtalk’s evil dwarf and high school yearbook nerd Mike Florio, who I reluctantly admit has been right about a few things, (just as stopped watches go) is doing his damnedest to create a controversy out of Peyton Manning’s decision to pull rank with former Denver Broncos quarterback Frank Tripucka and wear his formerly retired number 18 when he begins the 2012 NFL season under the knife center for the Broncos.

No fewer then three posts appeared in a single day criticizing Manning for donning the retired number on PFT. It’s not that Florio doesn’t have a point, he does, but athletes are superstitious people (Michael Jordan abandoned number 45 by like the third quarter of his first game back) and Elway would have probably sold his first-born into the Sierra Leone diamond mining trade just to get rocket-lazer-arm in Denver for next season.

Most likely to annoy me into posting this article:

If it goes against everything Manning believes in, then he should have politely declined. I’m sure if Manning had been wearing No. 7 since 1998, John Elway would “really want” Manning to wear Elway’s number, too. That doesn’t make it right.


Indeed, it flies in the face of the entire concept of retiring numbers. If a number is retired, it’s retired. The person for whom the number was retired should have no say in the matter; part of the honor is that the topic of unretiring the number should never be broached.

It’s the Catalina wine mixer! People have literally killed to be in this position!

In this case, the skids were greased last week, when reporters began contacting Tripucka and asking him about whether the number would be dusted off for Manning. What would anyone expect Tripucka to say? ”No, it’s mine . . . and while we’re on the topic get off my lawn”?

To his credit, Tripucka acted charitably. But he never should have been placed in that position.

Fair point. Then again, Tripucka probably saw the Patriots game.

In the end, the Broncos are the custodians of the team’s numbers.

So then why do you even care? As soon as Manning goes down he’ll go under the knife again, retire for good, and 18 in Denver will belong to Tripucka again. Does this really matter?

And to those of you who think that Tripucka has manipulated this situation merely to get his name back into circulation after nearly 50 years of obscurity, keep two things in mind. First, he’s 84. Second, he has Alzheimer’s.

Has anyone said that? Also, although it is truly unfortunate it’s not like he’s giving Manning power of attorney, or buying volcano insurance from Manning. Also, the insinuation that the Broncos or Manning are taking advantage of Tripucka in his current state is deeply misleading since Mrs. Tripucka says her husband would feel honored.

Manning is going to wear a number for the Broncos for a couple seasons (if he’s supremely lucky) and then it will come down again. If nobody seems to care, then why do you care so much?

The Ballad of the Banditos Makes Everything Better

If you’re a Redskins fan, like myself, you cannot be happy with six losses in a row. If you’re not, WELL PISS OFF!  Your team likely hasn’t lost 6 GAMES IN A ROW this season (apologies to Colts, Dolphins & Rams fans, you know the pain)! Ahem, excuse me, where was I?  Ah yes, well at least you can remember the good ole days when your team beat the team featured below in the Ballad of the Touchdown Banditos. This pure video gold is from the 87-88 Denver Broncos and features their “Three Amigos” (Vance Johnson, Mark Jackson and Ricky Nattiel) takin’ out all sorts of bad guys and varmits and doing all sorts of other cowboy like things.

I find it disturbing that this trend of making horrible music videos died at some point in the late 90s and 2000s.  I feel like a piece of me died with that trend.  Watch and enjoy ya hear?

From Everything is Terrible! via SBNation

LenDale White is not bitter at all

Before LenDale White was drafted, there were murmurs among NFL scouts that he had “maturity issues” to go along with being a fat tub of goo. Thus, White tumbled to the second round before being scooped up by the Tennessee Titans. After having some success with the Titans, White found himself out in the cold before the 2010 season when former Titans skipper Jeff Fisher decided that some guy named Chris Johnson was going to be the feature back for the team. In April, 2010, White was reunited with Carroll who had just been lured away from USC to Seattle just before it came out that Los Angeles had professional football after all.

After getting cut just a month later by Seattle basically for being a dick and smoking pot (and not sharing), White signed a two-year deal with the Denver Broncos, a homecoming for the Denver native. In the last preseason game before the 2010 season, White ruptured his Achilles’ tendon and likely played a role in getting Josh McDaniels shipped out.

Despite his recent setbacks, White maintained a diplomatic tone when asked about his college coach and one-time Trojan enabler Pete Carroll.

Let me stand in line for two hours and then leave without getting in TMZ:

White was leaving Voyeur nightclub in Hollywood with former USC teammate Dominique Byrd when we asked about reports that certain NBA players were complaining about a controversial sneaker … and LenDale replied:

“If it ain’t Chauncey Billups or Kobe Bryant … f*ck ‘em. Or if it ain’t the Denver Broncos or Chris Johnson … f*ck ‘em. Or D-Byrd … or the Trojans … minus Pete Carroll — f*ck you.”

When our camera guy quipped, “You love the Trojans” … LenDale continued, “Except for Pete Carroll. Minus Pete Carroll I have Trojan love.”

Okay, so White seems to still be upset about being pink slipped by the Seahawks before he had to serve a four-game suspension for coming up “Magic Johnson” on a drug test. But, really, he probably just needed a shot of tequila.

Where’s your messiah now, McDaniels? He’s off writing a book instead of using his powers to vanquish the Broncos’ rivals and save his coach’s job. Selfish bastard.

Tim Tebow has already accomplished everything humanly possible. There’s nothing left to do but tell the story of how he became the backup for the Denver Broncos.

Former Heisman Trophy winner Tim Tebow is working on an inspirational memoir.

Tebow is collaborating with Nathan Whitaker on “Through My Eyes,” scheduled to come out in April. HarperCollins announced the book Monday.

Read the story about how he led the Gators to the SEC Championship in his last season. Be amazed at the miracles he pulled in the Pacific. Did you know that every Filipino baby he circumscised became a saint and can stop bullets with their minds? Oh to have foreskin again.

Tebow’s autobiography could start a disturbing trend among young professional athletes in this country. England has seen several soccer stars write autobiographies before they hit the age of 30. As one might imagine, their books are as empty and vapid as their interviews and play for England. They’ve achieved nothing except extreme wealth and arrogance combined with a disregard for the common man. Even if they aren’t pompous, they don’t have much to say about their sheltered, pampered lives especially at that age.

The last thing we need is more of this nonsense cluttering the shelves. Many athletes wait until the end of their careers to write an autobiography. It would seem that would be the time to reflect upon one’s career. Success in college doesn’t ensure a long NFL career. Just ask every quarterback to come out of Florida. Being a winner in college isn’t unique or especially that interesting. Tebow may be more mature than many others coming out of college even if you take away the pious hype but that doesn’t mean that his insight into his career to date will be anything to worth reading for anyone besides Florida fans. I consider myself a diehard Chelsea fan but I have no desire to read Ashley Cole or Frank Lampard’s autobiographies. Manager Carlo Ancelotti? Absolutely. (A great read by the way. A review will be coming in the next couple days.)

If Tebow’s writing the book to preach his beliefs then a heads up would be great so anyone not interested won’t be subjected to whatever bathtub mint julep nonsense may be in it.

Tebow hasn’t accomplished anything. He was successful at the college level but has yet to accomplish anything professionally beside score two touchdowns. Colt McCoy is more successful than him so far. Think about that.

If that’s all it takes, I demand autobiographies from Brady Quinn and Kevin Kolb. While we’re at it, Sergio Kindle should write a book. He could talk about injuring himself and still getting a contract. See you can smoke crack like a mayor (Marion Barry not Kindle) or fall down two flights of stairs and still make it big, kids. Now that’s knowledge people can use. If I want advice on circumcision, I’ll go to a rabbi or Congolese village priest not an unproven NFL quarterback. Proven like Mark Rypien or Trent Dilfer? I’m all ears.

The Constitutional: Our (Not-So) Daily Links

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