It was Sunday afternoon. Wasn’t a damn thing funny. Bitch, Manchester City has that money. Apparently it pays for penalties against MLS teams and mediocre strikers.

While most English Premier League teams are bedazzling foreign countries with the ugliest of new jerseys, out of shape players and bullshit pre-season training, City’s Mario Balotelli is showing the world what his midseason form is all about.

The guy [Dzeko] who only scored one goal for City last season calling Balotelli out? Priceless. “I may go straight Torres on a goal but I can’t go for that“.

Balotelli throwing a “vaffanculo” at City manager Roberto Mancini? That’s a benching. He ended last season starting a fight with Manchester United players after City’s FA Cup win, cursing on TV in his post-match interview and getting smacked down in a club after hitting on some guy’s girlfriend. If this is his pre-season, we can’t wait until the Premier League kicks off. Consider this post the first entry in the Balotelli Blotter. Wherever he fucks up, we’ll be there. Stick with us. It’ll be worth your time.

And yes that was a Cheap Trick to get that Chromeo/Daryl Hall video in there. See how that happened?

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