Nigeria Knows How To Ram It
Leave it to Nigeria to take the sexual connotations out of the phrase “ramming speed”. First they want my bank account number and now this. Oh wait, they replaced “ramming speed” with the Ram Lovers Association of Nigeria. Never mind.
The 13th Annual Ram Fighting Championships were recently held in Lagos. The sport is one that gambling degenerates and PETA can get behind.
Ram fighting—which is also popular in Indonesia, China and Algeria—isn’t nearly as violent as dog and cock fighting. Little blood is spilled, and the rams don’t duel to the death. Fights are usually limited to 50 blows before they are called off, though in the finals the limit is lifted.
Rams butt heads in the wild so it’s only fair that people be able to bet on the fights. Don’t be surprised when the 14th Annual Ram Fighting Championships show up on Versus or Universal Sports. Maybe they’ll help Dick Ebersol break even after blowing all that money on the Olympics.
The winning goat Gobe got his owner, Lalekun Bayewu, a fridge and a gin and soda shower. One can only assume he was laid back with his mind on his fridge and his fridge on his mind.
Gobe beat a ram named Obama last year? Don’t let the Tea Party hear about him. He could become their new mascot.
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