Reading Between the Headlines
When I was ten years old, my grade school took a field trip to the White House. Part of our tour was the White House Briefing Room, where the President holds question and answer sessions with the White House press corps. During the tour Helen Thomas stopped by, spoke to our class, and couldn’t have been nicer. She signed autographs, shook hands and took pictures. So, needless to say, I was a little shocked when I heard: 1) the remarks she made about Israel, and, 2) that she was loathed by so many of her colleagues behind the scenes. Apparently, the resentment toward her was kept so quiet, no one would say a bad word about her until she was gone.
Let me say this: I LOVE these stories – especially when I hear about them before anyone else. Is there really anything better than knowing something before your friends? Five years ago, I had a friend who worked at a high-end hotel where celebrities and rock stars would stay when they were in town. Sometimes, if I was around and there was a famous person at the bar, he’d call me and I’d head over there and hang out. Anyone remember when Scott Stapp tried to fight 311? Ok, you probably don’t, but I was there… and it was awesome. I encourage readers to send me their inside information about random celebrities and sports stars. Maybe one day your insider info will end up a headline… or put me in jail. Just like these:
- With the record-setting debut of Stephen Strasburg and drafting of amateur superstar Bryce Harper, the Washington Nationals had a successful week.
The guy that supposedly came up with this monstrosity is a friend of the site, so I’m going to say this as diplomatically as possible: please stop using “Strasmas.” Just stop. Every time I read it or hear it, I die a little on the inside. Cultural memes like “Strasmas” are everything that’s wrong with this country – there are millions of people that think it’s cool to communicate with crap like “LOL,” “ROFL,” “UR HAWT,” and “OMG.” They deserve to die a slow death. So. Do. Jerks. Who. Write. Sentences. Like. This. To. Add. Emphasis. Because. They. Are. Too. Stupid. To. Use. Descriptive. Words.
Side note: I get the feeling that Steve’s performance on Tuesday night could lead to something very significant down the road. If Steve starts a day game after the opponent played the night before, and said opponent has a crappy offense or tired lineup, maybe Steve could take a shot at 20 strikeouts or a perfect game. Hey, look what’s happening this Sunday!
- USC was hit with major sanctions after an NCAA investigation.
It’s unfortunate that now anytime a college program has any kind of sustained success or dominance it’s assumed that they are probably crooked. But then again, what do you expect when Suge Knight hangs out on your sidelines?
- The University of Colorado joined the Pac-10 conference.
This is such a let-down. Of course, I know this is, and always was, about money. And Colorado isn’t the only one. But the fact that it’s Colorado just really bothers me. I’ve always had a soft spot in my heart for the Buffs since I read this SI storyas a kid. Plus, most of the people I’ve met who went to Boulder are laid-back kids who just wanted to relax, go hiking, listen to Phish and smoke some weed. Now, they’ve sold out to go corporate? What’s next? Will UVA kids stop wearing shorts with sewn-on sea creatures? Will girls at FSU stop being gorgeous? See what you’ve done, Colorado? My world is turned upside down…
- With the start of the world’s biggest sporting event, local gamblers are smoking vulture brains for good luck.
A “L. Lohan” from Los Angeles, CA writes in asking if said vulture brains will set SCRAM bracelets off.
- Michigan State coach Tom Izzo is considering an offer to coach the Cleveland Cavaliers.
What do Jerry Tarkanian, P.J. Carlesimo, Tim Floyd, Rick Pitino, John Calipari, Dick Vitale, Lon Kruger, Leonard Hamilton, Mike Montgomery and Reggie Theus have in common? There’s a chance Izzo is more Chuck Daly than he is Tim Floyd, but why take that shot? Especially with Bron-Bron hanging out there. Then again, what do you expect from a guy who named his arena after “America’s Home Loan Experts.”
- In part because he ended his career without a Stanley Cup, NBC hockey analyst Jeremy Roenick cried on-air after the Blackhawks captured the Cup on Wednesday night.
I understand his pain, but if it’s any consolation, video game Jeremy Roenick probably won about 2,000,000 EA Sports NHL ‘94 Titles on Sega Genesis. Thus, I’m going to give Roenick a pass simply because of this. He made little Wayne’s head bleed. “It’s not so much me as it’s Roenick.”
Have a good weekend, everyone. I’ll be in Philly, partying with this kid.
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BRAAAAAAAAAINS!!!!!!!!!