The Royal Canadian Mounted Police are quite cross with the organizers of the Vancouver Olympic closing ceremonies for depicting them in an unflattering light. Dudley Do-Right and Canadian Bacon were bad enough but now someone has gone too far.
Anyone who watched the ceremonies will remember the absurdity that ensued with flying beavers and lumberjacks in addition to a number by Michael Bublé who was accompanied by off-brand fly girls wearing sexy RCMP gear. Their costumes were not regulation and the RCMP brass was not happy.
“A number of RCMP employees have expressed concerns about the depiction of the RCMP during the closing ceremonies … specifically, the ‘Mountie costumes’ worn by the female dancers and entertainers,” assistant Commissioner Bud Mercer said in the memo sent to all RCMP members across the country.
“The RCMP core value of respect includes the respectful representation of female members,” Mercer’s memo said. “The RCMP does not condone any behaviour … that could possibly be perceived as demeaning.
Won’t someone please think of the children?! Now the RCMP knows how the Nazis felt after Mel Brooks’ depiction of them in Springtime for Hitler. The outrage! They should march on Vancouver while shaking their fists with impotent rage. That’s what Canadians (except Bob Probert and Tie Domi) do when they’re furious, right?
One would think the RCMP would be more pissed about being associated with Bublé especially when Snow was available and ready to licky licky boom boom down for the RCMP and America Jr.
Update: We were going to end with the previous paragraph but then we found something. You probably thought Snow only had one song. Much Music must have kept this gem under wraps. Canada could have sent the world packing with this:
Imagine if Snow joined forces with Color Me Badd. The possibilities…Wait, hold up. This isn’t right. We’re sorry and won’t blame you if you don’t come back. You didn’t deserve that. No one does.
If you were hesitant to watch one of the most interesting sports of all the Winter Games because you didn’t understand what the heck was going on…well then you are dumb and you need a giant picture like the one above to help you out. Thank the maker for we are here to assist you. Click on the picture and enjoy knowing what all the hipsters in the great white north have known about for ages. Plus, its really just a fine piece of graphic design. Very well done. Impressive even.e
Also, if you haven’t checked out PlayCurling.com you really should. I saw it on Levy & Zerkle’s tweets the other day and I must say, the game is friggin addictive. As a matter of fact, they found it so addicting, they’ve created an online curling tournament. Check out the twitter hashtag #blogswithstones for information on signing up or just to see what happens.
Finally, just because this post needed something sexy to keep it going, curling women can actually be pretty hot. If somehow haven’t seen them, click here, but be careful, some are NSFW.
Are you enjoying the tape-delayed barrage of figure skating and luge on every NBC network? Are you feeling the hyperbole of Jimmy Roberts along with the bloated presence of Al Michaels? No?
People can yell like Mexican soccer announcers but it’s not going to make cross country skiing any more exciting. You know what makes Olympic sports thrilling. Tropical countries.
The Jamaican bobsled team captured the imagination of even the most skeptic Olympic watcher and that was before John Candy. The Vancouver Olympics has offered an Ethiopian skier and Indian luger but they’re just slow. You know what these games need? Venezuela. Start at :50.
Now that’s drama. We need more overmatched people from tropical climates to liven these Games up. The 2002 Salt Lake City Games did it right. Hugo Chavez sent Iginia Boccalandro, a former basketball player, to represent Venezuela in the luge competition. It went as well as you would expect. She was unharmed after her accident and lived to luge another day.
If she was good enough for a presidential candidate without conviction like Mitt Romney, she’s good enough for you. The free heating oil is great but how about more winter sport athletes, Hugo?
Check out the heart-warming tale of the only Ethiopian pro skier who is headed to the Winter Olympics. Robel Teklemariam goes by the name “Beredoe Shartate” or ”Ice Slider” in English because there is no actual word for snow in the Ethiopian language and will be competing in the men’s 15-kilometer cross country skiing event. Pretty impressive for the guy to make it to the Olympics training only with roller skis. That is dedication there…of course he didn’t have any competition so his path was a little easier than most, but he’s got to have some skills otherwise they wouldn’t have sent him out there. Seriously though, how is this not the basis for the MUCH needed Cool Runnings 2 or some sappy The Blind Side type biopic? I sense a deal coming his way soon. Anyway, enjoy, happy friday.