Remember the time when you could kill two people and get away with it? O.J. Simpson probably wonders what happened to the good old days. People celebrated like they won something. Hell, we threw a “The Juice is Loose” party. (Mostly because we wanted a reason to throw a party and drink an absurd number of screwdrivers.) Now he can’t even talk about getting laid without having his ass handed to him.
The National Enquirer is reporting that a white supremacist jumped OJ in the prison yard and beat him to “a bloody pulp”. Apparently he was bragging that he banged more white women than Bryant Gumbel and Quincy Jones combined. Bad move, Nordberg.
Unknown to the former NFL star, The Juice has been a marked man behind bars ever since white supremacists overheard him brag about his sexual conquests of beautiful white women.
“Unfortunately for O.J., a group of young skinhead punks were within earshot – and they were enraged,” Simpson’s former business partner Bruce Fromong told The ENQUIRER in an exclusive blockbuster interview.
Inmates cheered as a muscular young skinhead knocked him to the ground, punching and kicking him to a bloody pulp and inflicting injuries so severe he secretly spent nearly three weeks in the infirmary before he recovered.
The humiliating beating left 63-year-old Simpson in agony – and threw him into a spiral of depression so deep that he’s now afraid to venture out of his cell, divulge sources.
You know you’re the most popular guy on the yard when everyone gets behind a skinhead beating up a black guy. Too bad Al Cowlings wasn’t there to take the beating for him. “Nooo! Hit me instead!”
OJ should have taken a cue from Julio Iglesias and Willie Nelson.
Now that’s as smooth as a warm jug of Carlo Rossi. Even skinheads can get with that. Well maybe not Julio but definitely Willie. Can’t we all just get along, guy with the swastika carved in your forehead?