Ever walk into a movie knowing it wasn’t going to be very good?  Maybe you’re there because the movie stars a legend like Robert DeNiro, so you feel obligated to give it a shot.  Now, let’s say this movie not only has DeNiro, but Al Pacino, too – as a self-respecting fan of you cinema, you kind of have to watch it, right? Read the rest of this entry

Milton Bradley, as we all now, is a sensitive fellow.  This above screen grab from SeattleDawg18 via the Chicago Sun-Times shows good ole Milton Bradley giving some fans what he feels is the appropriate response to some in-game taunts they were launching his way during the Mariners/Rangers game on Friday night.  If he hadn’t already, prior to this latest finger incident, he’s now given out an open invite to all fans to go ahead and screw with him as much as possible.  Its gonna be a long, long season for Milton.

Poor Uncle Milty.  Would Prozac be considered a performance enhancing drug for this guy or what?  Doesn’t he know the only good way to deal with a bully is to ignore the bully?  He needs to visit with Tiger and learn to meditate…or at least Latrelle Sprewell or something, he only choked someone out once, had to learn something, right?

Before K-State survived, Syracuse was knocked out by Butler. 

Yeah, 75% of the country’s brackets were done last weekend, so we don’t care.  What I really care about is the deification of Gus Johnson.  What happened to this guy?  He’s not that good anymore.  A few years ago, he was solid.  Now, he’s just another screamer.  I found him almost unbearable last night. 

Meanwhile, Billy Raferty explained the origin of “onions.”

I, on the other hand, will never get tired of Billy Raferty.

Joe Mauer signed an 8-year $184M extension with the Minnesota Twins.

Couldn’t be happier for Twins fans; Mauer is a great player (even though his guaranteed $184M is roughly $32M more than what the team contributed to the funding of their new ballpark.  Thanks, Hennepin County!).  I just find it interesting that people are back-slapping the Twins for stepping up to the plate and taking such a big risk.  The recently- deceased owner was reportedly worth $3.6B.  Yeah, that’s a “B” for BILLION.  Excuse me if I’m not as obsequious.

Vicente Padilla, a true gentleman of the game.

Vicente Padilla will be the Opening Day starter for the Dodgers.

Apparently, Dean Wormer was wrong.  Fat, drunk and Plaxico is a great way to go through life.

Gilbert Arenas will be sentenced today.  

I wouldn’t be surprised if Flip Saunders hopes for the chair.

Tim Tebow was cursed at when he suggested a prayer before the Wonderlic test.

Tebow is denying the story and if I were him, I’d deny it too.  The dude scored a 22 out of 50.  Just to give that score some context, 24 is the average for NFL QBs.  Even this guy beat him.  Clearly, Jesus was busy that day.   

Phil Hughes will start the season as the Yankees’ 5^th starter.

Color me shocked.  If you followed the Yankees in spring training even somewhat closely, it was pretty easy to see this wasn’t really a competition.  And since most teams don’t need a 5^th starter until May, once again, I must ask: who cares? 

Tiger Woods will hold a press conference the Monday before the Masters.

Wrestlemania XXVI is this weekend.

Now, there are two unrelated places that could both use Gus Johnson.

This week was kind of a downer, yes, I know.  Treat yourself to Keith Law’s Top 200 Rock Songs of the 1990’s.  In addition to his encyclopedic knowledge of music, I’m fairly certain he’s one of the few people in the world who could make the Kansas City Royals a playoff team.  That’s a rare combination of talent.   Have a great weekend, enjoy the games.

It’s been a busy week – Tiger’s back, the competition for spring training jobs are tightening up, and Luke Wilson is sponsoring (or it could be AT&T, at this point, I can’t really tell) some college basketball tournament that must not be too popular because it’s on during the day and only on CBS.  Anyway, on to this week’s headlines… 

• Tiger Woods announced he is returning to golf at the Masters.

Shocker.  He picked a tournament at a private, all-male club that has a small field of competition and restricts “patrons” from sneezing without asking for permission first.  Wake me when he plays somewhere that allows “commoners.”  Meanwhile, we got a sneak preview of what the next “Tiger Woods Golf” video game will look like.

• The Big East got hammered on the first day of the NCAA tournament.

Thanks for nothing, Georgetown and Marquette.  JTIII will be getting a bill for my bracket.  What the hell,  Big East?  Just because you got 8 bids doesn’t mean you need to lose them all the first weekend.  Villanova, we still cool.  But remember, you’re playing for Barry.

• ESPN’s Buster Olney reported that the Philadelphia Phillies had internal discussions about trading Ryan Howard for Cardinal first baseman Albert Pujols. 

While St. Louis fans spent the week arguing over who was worse: Keith Law or Olney, Philly fans instead got drunk and burned down both of their houses.       

• After apologizing for using cocaine and subsequently failing a drug test, Texas Rangers manager Ron Washington also admitted smoking pot and using amphetamines back in his playing days. 

Ron Washington seems like a lot of fun.  With one ex-addict already on the roster, Wash is sure setting one hell of an example for the rest of the team.

• The NFL plans to vote on changes to the overtime rules for next season’s playoffs.

 And somewhere, Marty Mornhinweg smiles, as he will still “take the wind.”

• Lance Armstrong is mad because Tony Kornheiser made a joke about running bicyclists off the road on his local radio show.

Lance, it’s called “context.”   Get over yourself.  Have you ever driven in DC?  Tony is right; the bicyclists there are insufferable and apparently color-blind as they appear unable to see red lights.

• John Fox thinks Tim Tebow had a “very, very good workout” for pro scouts the other day.

 A) It’s a workout.  B) This is the same guy who let Jake Delhomme start football games last year.  Pardon me if I wait for someone else’s opinion.

• The NBA approved Michael Jordan’s bid to purchase the Charlotte Bobcats – thereby becoming the first ex-player to ever hold a majority interest in an NBA team. 

Congrats to MJ.  I can’t wait until he uses a first round pick to draft his son then summarily trades him for a pair of Mom jeans.

Ludacris has put out a new single for his upcoming album “Battle of the Sexes” that is starting to set the internet ablaze.  Why you ask?  Well the track is entitled  ”Sexting” and starts out with Luda recreating the infamous Tiger Woods voicemail to frequent ho-bag Jaimee Grubbs. Pretty smart on his part, and a great way to get some early album promotion to tie his album in some way to the massive media scandal that is Tiger Woods overactive libido.

Now, usually I hate rap album skits.  So many of them are pure garbage and I thank Jeebus for digital technology that allows me to delete the vast majority of those tracks forever from my playlists.  However, for a minor rap skit on an album, its not horrible and sort of clever, especially from a marketing perspective.  Not a bad track either, give it a listen and a small chuckle.