One of my fondest memories of my youth was
getting beat up by upperclassmen going to Tribe games with my “uncle” and then hitchhiking home from Cleveland Municipal stadium and then Jacobs field after he was arrested for public intox. The other is watching the 1990′s Cleveland Indians do their best impression of a beer-league softball team.
As the Indians playoffs hopes begin to recede faster then my hairline a glimmer of white, translucent, and gingery hope has appeared. That’s right;
Aryan nation wet dream slugger Jim Thome was designated for assignment and scooped up by the Cleveland Indians, who are in the middle of a funk; dropping 6 of seven into a momentum halting sweep by the Detroit Tigers.
Pass me an ecto-cooler juicebox, ESPN:
Thome spent 12 seasons with Cleveland from 1991-2002, hitting a team-record 334 homers and helping the Indians get to two World Series. He hit 52 in his final season before signing as a free agent with Philadelphia, a decision that angered many Indians fans who will have to welcome him back.
“He’s excited,” Indians general manager Chris Antonetti said. “He’s fired up to come back and join the team. I am hopeful and confident that fans will embrace him wearing an Indians uniform again. He’s not only an exceptional player but a person as well. Even if he wasn’t a person that hit 600 home runs, he’s just a great person.”
Thome also played for the Chicago White Sox, and Minnesota Twins. But the Cleveland Indians are like the still-bitter-ex who knows that she banged the two guys with their driver’s licenses on your block but you are still kinda into her because she lets you choke her.
Whoah, that got weird, people.
Anyway, let’s revisit the 1995 Cleveland Indians starting lineup, when Thome was just a beanstalk playing third base:
That’s right, Manny Ramirez batted seventh in that lineup!
Well now, a piece of my happy place is coming back to me; like when I kidnapped the waitress at FRIDAY’s (acquitted, well, hung jury).