If you guessed still being a douchebag, winner winner chicken dinner.
The Fiorentina striker is about to come off his 101st suspension for drug use and he’s already in trouble again. This time, he beat up a waiter who refused to take his Player’s Club card.
The disgraced Romanian international who is currently serving a suspension from the game for doping, attacked a waiter in a local bar over a dispute about the bill. Witnesses have been explaining that Mutu refused to pay the bill for his drinks as he claimed to have had an account with the establishment.
The waiter, a 28-year-old Yugoslavian man refused to accept the player’s explanation which resulted in the Viola hit man punching the man in the face breaking his nose. The victim was taken to the nearby hospital at Santa Maria Nuova.
“Don’t you know who I am?”
“Eh no … Oh Adrian! Mi scusi! I didn’t recognize you at first. You’re not assuming your regular position of doing lines off a porn star’s ass in a Roman hotel room window!”
In Mutu’s defense, his latest ban was for sibutramine, an appetite suppressant. Unfortunately it doesn’t suppress asshole. That appears to be genetic.
No charges have been brought yet but it’s probably safe to assume that someone will be bought off. This is Italian soccer after all.
You know what movie doesn’t pass the test of time? Tango and Cash. I remember seeing the previews and thinking it was going to be the greatest movie of all time. (I thought the same thing about the Three Amigos. “Would you say I have a plethora of pinatas?”) The prison break scene was solid but it could have been better. They should have broken into prison instead of out. No. They should have broken into a women’s prison. Maybe that could be the premise of Tango and Cash 2: Electric Boogaloo. Stallone and Russell are probably overpriced so they could be replaced by Manchester City striker Mario Balotelli and his brother, Enock.
Brescia jail officer Calogero Lo Presti said: “We saw a high-powered Mercedes coupé come through the gate with two lads on board, and after a few minutes we realised Balotelli was one of them.
“They were questioned for 30 minutes to get their details and by the end both were frightened. Balotelli said he was sorry.
“They said they had seen the gate was open, and went in without knowing that you need special permission to visit a jail.
“They added they were specially curious at the fact it was a women’s prison.”
Too bad Mario and Enock mistake porn for documentaries. This is the difference between Europe and the United States. No way a black man in this country goes into a prison by choice (besides Omar) although points should be given for busting into a women’s prison. If the Balotelli brothers want a good time with porn stars, they should hook up with Adrian Mutu. They’ll be doing lines off a hooker’s ass in no time.
