First Oasis breaks up and now this. Remember how down Marcus was when Jacqueline played him in Boomerang? The people of Manchester must feel the same way. Times are ill on the blue side of Manchester these days. Oasis breaks up, Man City’s playing like a mid-table team and now Ricky Hatton has been reduced to appearing as a WWE side show.
Bony T didn’t show Marcus any mercy and we don’t think he’d have any for Hatton either. On the plus side, it looks like retirement’s been good to Hatton. Pies and beers make the gentleman of leisure. No sexy beast here.
Speaking of Boomerang, start at 3:00. Bang bang bang!
This wrestling event way more delicious than say jello wrestling, no sir, this is the GRAVY WRESTLING CHAMPIONSHIP. It is an event to raise money for the East Lancashire Hospice in England and it used about 440 gallons of gravy that was juuuuust past its “best if used by” date. Whatever, i’m sure it was still delicious. Check out the video, some hot female on female gravy wrestling awaits you.
Former WWE superstar Ultimate Warrior delivered a fine eulogy to Michael Jackson on Friday and I just thought you, our good readers, would love to hear what he had to say. Don’t shoot the messenger.
Jacko. Finally, he beat it.
I imagine all the crying about the death of this recent drug-soused entertainment freak has most to do with the unfortunate inconvenience that the other drug-soused entertainment freaks now face. They will have to look for another local, safe and reputable babysitter. No longer will they be able to drop their kids off down the street at Jacko’s to be watched for the afternoon and spend some play time with his own kids.
I hate the paparazzi, and think they should all be shot for the obsessive invasion of privacy. But I’m really going miss ALL those TMZ and Entertainment Tonight video clips of Jacko’s and other celebrity kids playing together. You ever see any of those? Weren’t they great? Didn’t they make you feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside? Worked for me. Every time I caught one it made me believe maybe he wasn’t a pedophile. After all, famous and rich entertainers, with all kinds of money to go to any expense to have things accurately checked out for themselves, wouldn’t let their own little babies near a pedophile…would they?!
Well, you gotta give him credit for one thing. He spent all his money (and then some) before he died. And that’s not an easy thing to calculate. Go ahead, ask your financial planner if he has a plan to pull it off. For all the horrific mismanagement of millions and millions and millions of dollars, here at the end, Jacko did a pretty damn good job at balancing the books in his favor. Sorry, at my new age and with the way the Obama economic plan is going, I couldn’t help but recognize this stunner.
I’ll tell you somethin’. I hate the fuckin’ movies. Make one decent movie and all of a sudden you think you’re an expert on rock and wrestling. There’s not much worse than an actor who thinks that playing a role makes him capable of doing the same thing in real … well, fake life. Shortly after coming back from the dead, Mickey Rourke took on Chris Jericho during Wrestlemania in April. Great Muta in the morning. What the hell is happening to wrestling? The Junkyard Dog would roll over in his grave if he saw the state of the sport today. Unfortunately he won’t roll because he’s dead.
In a statement to rock news website Blabbermouth.net, the rocker says, “I have no idea how I got roped into this one. I guess someone is making money off it.
“I will be there with bells on, and this Tracy Smothers so-and-so is going to find out just what it’s like to go toe-to-toe with an intergalactic god! I just hope he shaves his armpits first.”
Whooo! When Smothers gets a taste of Urungus’ Meat Sandwich finishing move, he’ll finally know what it’s like to get rocked to sleep. All respect due to the Honky Tonk Man and the Shake Rattle and Roll.