Brian Boitano has a cooking show on Food Network. Let that marinate for a moment. I should be angry but I’m not. These are the same clowns that forced Rachel Ray and Guy Fieri on us without so much as an apology. I refuse to accept that Boitano deserves his own cooking show but at least he’s doing something everyone can imagine he would do after retiring from figure skating. He’s not out driving drunk and stealing cars like Andrei Lutai.
Lutai, a figure skater from Russia, was arrested after stealing a car from a gas station and driving drunk in Lake Placid. That’s pretty gangsta for a figure skater. What was he doing at a gas station without a car? Getting his sequins fixed in the bay or bathroom? He was charged with grand larceny, criminal possession of stolen property, unauthorized use of a motor vehicle and aggravated driving while intoxicated. He’s being held on $100,000 bail. Oksana Baiul will drive right over and bail him out as soon as she finishes that sixth Long Island Iced Tea and figures out why the road is sideways.