If you’re pissed at the NFL and NBA for using acts such as the Black Eyed Peas or Faith Hill for their theme music, blame the NRL. Australian rugby league has been using mediocre music since the late 80s to promote their brand. Several months ago, we brought you the homoerotic Tina Turner joint that introduced the 1989 NRL season. Bear down even.
Since that debacle, the NRL hasn’t been able to pump anyone up for what is legitimately one of the toughest sports in the world. The league has used artists such as Tom Jones, Frankie Goes To Hollywood, Hoodoo Gurus, Chumbawumba and “racing car noises” in the past. 2011 is no different. Enter Bon Jovi with “This Is Our House”.
That’s one step above Tracie Spencer’s “This House“. That song doesn’t make you think bonecrushing tackles and concussions being handed out like food at a soup kitchen. It makes you think of, well American sports. Let’s find the most non-threatening, milquetoast music that will make people who aren’t watching or interested tune in. “I always hated football but now that Faith Hill is singing the theme song to Sunday Night Football, I’ll tune in. That Joan Jett original was too controversial and she’s a lesbian anyway.” The PR and marketing people for Aussie Rules must be chuckling as they seek out Megadeath and DMX.
I was going to stick to Bon Jovi but I decided to actually look up NRL theme songs from the artists I mentioned. Check them out after the jump but I warn you they aren’t much better.
Hockey Night In Canada will finally be shown here in the US. Ooh that’s good. However they’re changing the theme song. Ooh that’s bad.
HNIC will be finally be shown on the NHL Network which is great news for hockey fans in the US. For you non-hockey fans, we’re talking about the Canadian broadcast of hockey games and not Principal Joe Clark. Then again maybe he could co-host Coaches Corner with Don Cherry instead of Ron MacLean. Imagine the two of them locking horns. I should be the black Don Cherry this Halloween now that I think about it. Call me Black Cherry. Sorry, I digress.
The CBC is also making some big changes for the new season like broadcasting games in Punjabi for starters. The most blasphemous change is the new theme song. HNIC has been known for its theme song in the same way that we recognize the old The NFL Today or NBA on NBC theme songs. The official story is that the CBC couldn’t reach an agreement with the copyright holders.
“Every brand needs to be a little refreshed,” [CBC Sports Executive Director Scott] Moore said in a telephone interview. “It needs to get a little younger, it needs to get a little more relevant every year.
Instead of imposing a new HNIC theme song on the masses, CBC has decided to hold a contest and let the public vote for the new theme on a show called Anthem Challenge. The contest is down to five semifinalists. You can listen to them here. We’ll leave it up to you to decide whether they’re worthy but the original is still the best.
Iconic theme songs don’t necessarily need to get younger or fresher. How often is the new theme song better than the old one when it comes to the great ones? There’s no question that a large part of the appeal of a theme song is nostalgia especially when it comes to sports. Compare the NBA on NBC theme song with the crap that is the NBA on ABC or Monday Night Football. This Hank Williams/Pink/Rob Thomas bullshit is absurd. Faith Hill doesn’t get me hyped up to watch football. This does.
What do you think of when you think of basketball on NBC? Roundball Rock and the great Bulls run. ABC? Shit songs you can’t stand forced down your throat in order to appeal to people who really don’t care about the game. Those tranny Pussycat Dolls? Rob Thomas? Who’s next? Michael Buble? Zamfir, Master of the Pan Flute? I’m not going to front. The John Tesh joint was hot but how often does that happen?
Anyway, it just sucks that the theme song is changing but if it means we get to watch Hockey Night in America, I’ll take it.
The theme song for Euro 2008 was recently released and for a soccer theme song, its really not that bad although I’m not sure why a sporting event actually needs a theme song. What is bad is the computer animated kids who must be some sorta Euro 2008 mascot thing or something. They are annoying beyond belief. Its got Shaggy warbling in his pseudo reggaeton style, on a side note, who the hell thought he would have a career longer than Bombastic and It Wasn’t Me? I mean, that was one crap song and he’s somehow held on and made an acual music career with subsequent “hits”. Still amazes me. Anyway, if you’re interested, here you go