Former elite Australian national swimmer Simon Partridge has retired from swimming at 21 and has decided to “let his hair down”. Apparently this includes dropping trou to show off a G-string with a donkey face right over his goods to his friends while on a train. That incident offended the other passengers a bit and got him arrested and fined over a thousand dollars for his discretion. Best thing about his crime? He had just gotten arrested 4 days earlier and was out on bond.

So, for as much flack as Michael Phelps has gotten in the past year…i mean, least he hasnt done this? Although, you can’t fault a man for wanting to rock a donkey g string. Who hasn’t felt the allure of wanting to wear a thin pair of g stringed undergarments with an animal on ? Am I right or am I right? Wait…I’m not right. Damn.

From Illawarra Mercury

Swimmers at the Roosevelt High School in Des Moines, Iowa are suspected of retaliation by fetus from a snowball attack after one of their swim meets. The swim team is being investigated for stealing pig fetuses from the science department and “decorating” their rival’s cars with them.

Lord knows what kind of repercussions these students face for this because in the age of zero tolerance, one has to figure this won’t be taken lightly. Its a shame though, this seems like a perfectly harmless prank. I mean, its human nature to escalate a battle. One day its snowballs, the next day pig fetuses, the next day you disembowel a cow over the coaches car. Seems logical to me.

I hope the principal takes it easy on these kids because the Deuce approves of these actions. We thank them for giving us the chance to use the words pig fetus in a post.

From Political Gateway