NHL Archives

Keith Tkachuk Takes Facial Like A P*rn Star

Wednesday, January 20th, 2010 at 4:45 pm  
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Keith Tkachuk shouldn’t be surprised if he gets a call from a San Fernando Valley movie studio. Anyone willing to take a shot like this to the face needs to be on film.

Jenni Lee says he already has the teeth for it.

Teddy Bear Apocalypse

Thursday, December 10th, 2009 at 3:23 pm  
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Those poor bears…they never had a chance.

The Next Ovechkin

Wednesday, December 9th, 2009 at 5:05 am  
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This kid has one amazing trick shot up his sleeve.  He is already a greater goal scorer at 9 years old than you will ever be in your entire life…and if you are a professional hockey player reading this, it even includes you.  This is just simply, the sickest hockey goal that I have ever seen…ever.  The best reaction to it is the goalie who is like “WTF do I do against this??”  Just awesome.  Watch.

Keith Ballard Cares Not For Goalies Who Allow Goals On His Shift

Tuesday, December 1st, 2009 at 6:11 am  
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BALLARD SMASH!!! Apparently that picture above is the result of Florida Panthers defenseman Keith Ballard venting his frustration after seeing his goalie give up a goal…by taking a swing at his goalie’s facemask. Poor Tomas Vokoun didnt have a chance against Ballard’s hockey stick that he whipped at Vokoun’s face at like 100mph. Vokoun had to get carted off the ice on a stretcher after the blow you can view below.

Man, I’d hate to see what Ballard does when someone crosses him off the ice. Give Ballard the wrong change at Starbucks…that’s a stabbing. DO YOUR JOB!!

Samuel L. Jackson Would Like To Learn You The Inglewood Jack

Tuesday, September 22nd, 2009 at 7:09 am  
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It’s been a minute, NHL. We like that you didn’t waste any time getting into regular season form. If that hit didn’t get you excited for hockey season, Jules Winnfield would like to have a word with you.

Bring it on, muthafuckas! Just bring it on!