The hot rumor out there today is that Chris Paul has demanded to be traded…to one of three teams of his choosing. According to the CBS Sports,

Paul’s list of preferred destinations consists of the Knicks, Magic and Lakers, and members of his inner circle already have sent word to the Hornets of his desire to be traded to one of those teams, sources say. If Paul has his way, he’s played his last game in a Hornets jersey.

So you see what he’s done there? No? Well lets look at the three teams he’s chosen and then I’ll tell you where I think he really wants to go.

The Lakers have Kobe and Gasol, the Magic have Dwight Howard and the Knicks have Amare Stoudemire to go with Mike D’Antoni’s run and gun offense where Paul would fit in perfectly. The Lakers and the Magic probably can’t afford to pull this trade off, not enough cap room and not enough players to trade away.

The Knicks, who cleared away a ton of salary in an attempt to get Lebron James or Dwayne Wade to go with Stoudemire haven’t killed their cap even with the Amare signing. They have the cap space, they have trade pieces, they have a big time city, a big time arena in Madison Square Garden, a big time media market and most of all…he’d be the star.

Stoudemire would pick up right where he left off with Steve Nash if Chris Paul was leading the offense and getting him the ball. In turn, making Stoudemire look good will only make Paul look better. He won’t be the second fiddle or a star in a small market. He will be the number one basketball player in New York City and he’ll probably turn the team into a winner immediately making him the savior of New York basketball.

If I were a betting man, and I am, I am putting my money on the New York Knicks being the place Paul really wants to go. If Paul puts up enough of a hissy fit, it actually might happen.

So, as  you all probably know by now, LeBron James going to play for the Miami Heat for the foreseeable future. You probably heard this information any one or more of these ways: live on ESPN during an hour long broadcast titled “The Decision” where LeBron sat with Jim Gray to discuss where he was going to play next year, on ESPN.com’s Lebron James web page the “LeBron Tracker”, on Twitter where currently James is trending in the top 5, in the news where according to Google he is the number 1 and 3 trending search term currently, on your local news, on the radio…basically, LeBron James is everywhere.

As a matter of fact, LeBron James news has been around so much lately that I won’t know what to do anymore without the LeBron James speculation and news. That hour long ESPN self promoting television special James did should really just be the pilot episode to the rest of LeBron’s life on televison for us all to watch.

It took a month for him to figure out where he was going and he brought us all along for the ride. Imagine how long it is going to take for him to find a house to live in down in Miami?  Can you imagine the speculation? The drama?  Somebody call TLC or HGTV because I think I found them a freaking gold mine. Who cares about Property Virgins when you can spend the next two months figuring out which tony neighborhood The King is going to move into down in Florida??  I NEED TO KNOW MORE! CHAD FORD ENLIGHTEN ME AS TO THE PROPERTY TAXES OF THE LOCALITIES IN WHICH LEBRON MIGHT POSSIBLY HAVE AN INCLINATION TO MOVE INTO!

I want to see how long it takes him to decide what he is going to eat for breakfast. I want the cameras there documenting his every move from waking up to brushing his teeth to putting on goddamned deodorant until we all finally know whether or not it will be Captain Crunch or Coco Puffs for cereal this morning. The whole time, I want, nay, i NEED Michael Wilbon commentating that he thinks that Frankenberry might have an outside chance to pull off an upset at being in his bowl today. THIS INFORMATION WILL MAKE ME WHOLE AS A HUMAN BEING!!!

If ESPN can devote an hour of its valuable news broadcasting time to “The Chosen One” then why not just give us a whole channel of it? OBVIOUSLY this is what the fans of the NBA want and need. After the World Cup ESPN 3 won’t be used online anymore, just like it was never used when it was ESPN 360, so why not just make it ESPN-LeBron and give us what we deserve. ALL LEBRON ALL THE TIME! This just makes sense.

We have a hole in our lives now and only LeBron can fill it.

Its the 16th championship title for the LA Lakers as they beat the Boston Celtics in Game 7 of the NBA Finals by the score of 83-79. Shockingly, their Wheaties box is already set to go out to your local grocery store. Check your store shelves in a month or so for it if you want it. Personally, as a Washington sports fan I had no horse in this race but in the interests of not being a sore loser I wish the Lakers and their fans congratulations for an excellent season.

Even though it would’ve been a heck of a lot cooler to see Phil Jackson lose one of these things for once.  That guy is friggin bullet-proof. Also, can people put the rest the whole Kobe is as good as MJ now b/c he won almost as many titles?  Kobe wasn’t even the best player on the team for the ones he won with Shaq. He was the Jimmy Olson to Shaq’s Superman. Kobe is an excellent player, but he is no Michael Jordan.

If you don’t believe me, look up the stats on Basketball-Reference.com and you’ll see, its not even close. As a matter of fact, Lebron and Dwayne Wade are probably closer to his skills than Kobe is.

Nevertheless, congrats Lakers. John Wall is now gonna be gunning for you. TO BE THE BEST YOU GOTTA BEAT THE BEST!

The Lakers better not go on a losing streak otherwise Ron Artest might go back to the Henny and skunk with a bit of Brand Nubian-style beatin’ down punks on the side. The drama and quote machine is back in the spotlight after an interview which will appear in the Sporting News magazine on December 7th. All topics were covered from St. John’s to the infamous fight at the Palace.

The interview also touched on Artest’s partying ways. It’s a good thing Tiger decided that there was sex in the champagne room otherwise more people would have noticed Charlie Weis crying in a bathtub full of mac and cheese. They’d also be making noise about Artest’s admission that he used to drink during halftime when he played for the Bulls.

“I used to drink Hennessy … at halftime,” Artest says in the interview, which hits newsstands this week. “I (kept it) in my locker. I’d just walk to the liquor store (near the stadium) and get it.”

Anyone who has been to the United Center knows there might as well be scalpers selling Hennessy and Courvoisier along with pints of Gordon’s Gin outside the arena. Artest probably cashed his paychecks at the same place he bought the hen-rock.

Artest admitted that he partied every day and night while playing for St. John’s. His drinking kept up when he reached the NBA.

“When I was a 19-year-old father, whew. I was a single pimp! I was wild. A lot of marijuana and alcohol—even before (that age). … I (still) party and I have fun, but not like I used to. I used to drink every night and party every night.”

Who knew being a single pimp father was the key to getting your party on? Shawn Kemp and Jason Caffey must have stories for days. They sure have kids for months. If there’s anyone that should be drinking every day, it’s a New Jersey Net. At least it’ll give him an excuse for sucking so much.

We didn’t even get to the part of the interview where he discusses how he still wants to fight Ben Wallace. Oh, he’s willing to get his suspension on again.

Our boy, ‘Toine Walker finally got a plan together to pay back the various casinos that he owes over $770k because he failed to pay back a bunch of casino markers. With fines and restitution added, Walker has to pay up to the tune of just over $900,000. Ouch! That’s gotta be tough for a man with no job. He must pony up about $13,000 a month minimum at first and if he ever gets a basketball gig in the NBA or Europe he must pay a minimum of just over $21,000 a month. Double ouch! To use Antoine’s words:

“I’ve made some mistakes with some finances,

With the luck that Iverson has had finding a job this year, I’m sure that ‘Toine will have no problem getting a job. Everyone wants a me first, shoot first, out of shape, 33 year old forward on their roster. Well, maybe not here, but Europe might be calling, I mean he averaged 8.5 ppg last year in the NBA, that is like at least 13ppg there in Europe easy.

He’d better get a job quick because the judge in this case, Melanie Andress-Tobiasson (right), apparently has no tolerance for any sort of shenanigans with his payments:

“I can tell you at the point he stops making payments, I will bind him up so fast it’ll make your head spin,”

Or, maybe she’s just kinky like that?

From the Providence Journal