The bad news?  Well, you fell into a hole in a mountain son.  Check this skier out who narrowly avoids death while falling off a mountain top, crashing upon landing, then falling into a hole in the earth.  If they could dub Homer Simpson’s voice throughout his fall i’d imagine its something like “D’oh! D’oh! D’oh! D’ohD’ohD’ohD’ohD’oh! D’ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh….”  Amazing that he lived.

You know its baseball season when Chicago White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen is talking. It didn’t take him long this year for him to say something of note either, yesterday Guillen was talking about his own mortal demise.

“I hope I die on the field,” he says. “I hope when I walk to change the pitcher, I drop dead and that’s it. I know my family would be so happy that it happened on the field. They wouldn’t feel bad because that’s what I’ve always wanted to do. You die on the field — good luck, get him out of here, next man.”

Sure its a romantic (and morbid) thought that Ozzie has there, ya know, to die doing what you love to do, but I’m also sure there’s plenty of Tigers and Indians fans that would love to make that a reality for Ozzie. He’s not the most liked manager outside of the south side. Some north siders might even be salivating at the thought of him dropping dead at the pitcher’s mound.

Not that Ozzie would ever watch his words, but he might want to rethink his exit strategy on this world.

From Chicago Tribune