Cricket Archives

Randy Johnson Aint The Only One Who Can Hit Birds

Friday, June 5th, 2009 at 6:30 am  
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They can do it over in England as well. This video is a week old, but we’ve been gone from blogging for a bit, so suck it. Check out cricketer Jacques Rudolph as he nails a bird throwing the ball back in during a match between Yorkshire and Lancashire. Poor little birdy…poor little dead birdy. At least he has the courtesy to take it off the field himself. Stand up guys those cricket players.

Its still not as impressive as RJ’s though. Congrats on getting #300 against my Nats, by the way Randy. We now have given up Bonds biggest homer and Randy Johnson’s biggest win. I wonder what else the Nationals can do for other teams? Here’s Randy’s bird shot just for posterity’s sake.

That’s One Way To Throw A Match

Tuesday, February 24th, 2009 at 5:05 am  
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Leave it to the Indians to find new ways to abandon a sporting event. Monkeys riding elephants and chasing tigers onto the pitch, a Muslim-Hindu battle royale or simply landing a helicopter in the middle of a cricket match.

A helicopter sent players and officials running for cover after it landed in the middle of a cricket game. The piloit mistook a painted “H” in the corner of the field for a target. He also thought a nearby fire were smoke signals intended for him.

The game was continued after 30 minutes which gave the home team time to cork their cricket bats, take a tea break or do whatever it is you do during breaks.

Greatest Cricket Catch Ever

Tuesday, February 17th, 2009 at 5:21 am  
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Yea, cricket. See we at the Deuce, we don’t discriminate. We report on all sports, including cricket. Now, we know that its not the most exciting sport but this has never been done before and is certainly worthy of some attention. I’d give Australian Cricketer Adam Voges an 8.6 on form but 9.8 on level of difficulty. Enjoy it while it lasts, it’s been taken down a lot.

R Kelly’s Dog Runs Loose At Cricket Match

Friday, July 18th, 2008 at 4:15 am  
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How cute. Maybe we should give the dog some credit. At least it’s not pissing on underage girls.

The Official Cricketer of The Deuce

Friday, April 18th, 2008 at 3:02 pm  
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It’s been a while since we had a cricket post here at the Deuce, but with today being the opening match of the new Indian Premier League — and as such, the world debut of big-money, franchise cricket (just a century or so behind every other major world team sport) — we figured that it was time to bring you the latest on the greatest game that no one in America remotely understands.

We thought that a discourse about what the IPL means to the future of world cricket might be in order, or perhaps an essay on whether the big money and mercenary values of franchise Twenty20 can co-exist in the long run with Test and other multi-day versions of the sport. We considered publishing these even though we knew that they’d bore you to tears. Because someday, you’re gonna care about cricket. But then, browsing the rosters of the new, ludicrously-named IPL squads (Chennai Super Kings? Kolkata Knight Riders?) we made a discovery.

The Deuce is proud to name its first Official Deuce Player in any sport: Napoleon Einstein, of the aforementioned Super Kings.
How can you not elevate to Official Player status a young man whose name sounds suspiciously like one of the names considered by Homer Simpson before he rechristened himself Max Power? In a week that saw Miggy Tejada admit that he’s actually 53, how can you not establish as your Blog Icon a top-tier professional athlete who claims to be nearly 19, but clearly is a prepubescent 12 year old? Napoleon Einstein is a man(child) who actually claims to be older than he really is. That’s a true phenom — he levels the playing field by hiding his precociousness. The fact that he’s an all-rounder is the icing on the cake.
But what we love best about Napoleon is the diffidence with which everyone treats his name. Does his Cricinfo page make any note of the fact that, you know, his name is Napoleon Fucking Einstein? No. Does his official team bio? Nope. They focus on his devotion to the game, and the fact that he just sprouted his first pube made the recent world champion Indian U-19 squad. That’s badass. Try finding an article about God Shammgodd — much less an official bio — that doesn’t focus on his moniker. Napoleon doesn’t need the superficial hype. He lets his bat and his spin do the talking for him.
But we’ll hype him anyway. Here’s to you, Napoleon Einstein. We love you.