Apparently a super injunction can’t cover up the super injection Manchester United’s Ryan Giggs gave reality show never-was Imogen Thomas. That line should get me a job with US Weekly, People Magazine or any British newspaper. I’ll let the good people of Taiwan explain instead of torturing you with more tabloid-ready copy.
The Premier League season is only several weeks old yet diving is in mid-season form. Eduardo’s dive against Celtic in the Champions League set the European standard while Wayne Rooney dove like he was going down on a 70 year old hooker last weekend against Arsenal. Latin America isn’t going to take this increasing trend standing up. Witness one of the worst dives you will ever see. An added bonus is one of the worst refereeing decisions in the history of sports.
The video ended before it could catch a man in a bumblebee costume paying off the ref on the touchline. He yelled, “Ay ay ay! No es bueno!” and ran off into the tunnel. Just another shady ass day in Latin American soccer. Your move, Italy.
Curt Schilling says Harlequins are doing it wrong. Who can forget his “heroic” 2004 bloody sock stunt? He saved Boston and sentenced the rest of America to a lifetime of hearing from insufferable Red Sox fans. The sock is already enshrined in the Baseball Hall of Fame along with George Brett’s pine tar bat. Maybe Brett’s bat is in the Royals Hall of Fame but it’s a still a hall albeit with much less fame. Where will Harlequins’ Tom Williams fit into the history of great cheaters? Somewhere between Bill Belichek and Albert Belle.
Williams and the club were both found guilty of fabricating a cut to the mouth in order to allow substituted fly-half Nick Evans to return to the field with five minutes remaining.
Television cameras spotted Williams winking towards the bench with ‘blood’ smeared around his mouth.
Two members of the team’s medical team had misconduct charges dismissed which seems a bit suspect. Did Williams have fake blood on him before the medics came out to “assist” him? He couldn’t have hatched the plan himself. The director of rugby was also cleared although the club was fined £215,000 half of which is suspended for two years. Someone else had a hand in this subterfuge fail but we may never know the full details until Williams has an author ghostwrite his inevitably uninteresting autobiography. See Cashley Cole.
Robinson admitted posting a message on [Facebook] last week that read: “I am paying anybody who have read the book ‘there are no children here’ by Alex Kotlowitz $30-40 which in some classes you have to read at UB (even more money if you have to read the book a little more!!) to write a 3-4 page paper, on a couple questions which was assigned.”
Robinson was suspended indefinitely for his efforts after another student saw the posting and alerted the school newspaper. He took it down and completed the assignment.
For his next trick, Robinson will solicit ladyboys and untaxed cigarettes on MySpace. The enriched uranium requests will go on Friendster.
Robinson should consider himself lucky. Honor code violators at UVA are strung up and beaten like Russians clubbing the fuck out of a baby seal.
We didn’t have a chance to speak on so-called Super Sunday with Manchester United vs. Liverpool and Arsenal vs. Chelsea yesterday. We’ll let the picture above do the talking about the first match as 10-man Liverpool were crushed 3-0 by United. Unsilent put the second match in five words yesterday. Chelsea made Easter tolerable by beating the Arse 2-1. The win put them five points off of leaders United while Arsenal dropped to third. If Chelsea lost, I would have spent the rest of the day thinking about the betrayal of 8 lb, 6 oz newborn baby Jesus by Bill Richardson.
Don’t think this changes our opinion of Avram Grant. Even a blind pig finds a truffle every now and then. Oh I don’t want to get in trouble. A blind, kosher pig. Whew…
Deadspin’s Dave Hirshey did touch on something else we couldn’t get to due to the sauced-up singing at Nevada Smiths and Central Bar as well as the man on Monday. Derby manager Paul Jewell.
Jewell took over Derby this season knowing he had an impossible task keeping them in the Premiership. He decided to go down fighting however no one thought he would lead by example.
News of the World has access to a sex tape made by Jewell of himself with a mistress. (Images may be NSFW although they are blurred out)
Jewell showing how he keeps his hoes in check by keeping his pimp hand strong.
NOTW describes an hour long bondage video made of Jewell and some lady who ain’t his wifey. He’s got some ‘splainin to do!
We could make the obligatory Spitzer comment about him not possibly being stupid enough to tape himself cheating but we don’t want to apologize down the road.
I just hope that one day me missus tells me to “fuck her in daylight on my car”. I’ll bang her up on my Trablant real nice.
