You know a small part of you felt for stupid Flanders when his wife Maude was taken out by a t-shirt gun. Don’t feel bad about feeling more sympathy for a cartoon character than this Palmeiras fan who takes himself out.
All this video needs is the sad saxophone playing while the guy lies face down on the pavement. “Saxamaphone”. Maybe the tv show could use the loser music from the Price is Right. That makes every tragic situation hilarious.
There’s no question about it. Botafogo’s Andre Luis is batshit crazy. He’s obviously unstable and should be kept away from women, small children and animals. You might remember Andre from such incidents as getting arrested during a game and causing a near riot this summer. Well he’s at it again.
The Botafogo star was sent off this weekend for … Just watch.
I can respect demanding respect. Showing Andre a yellow was like spitting in his face. Like a good man I know says, “Go big or go home”. It’s red or nothing. Giving him a yellow is an insult to his manhood. Imagine the blow to his street cred. The ref might as well have called his mother a dirty road whore.
The window to weight gain is closing fast on the original Ronaldo now forever known as Fat Ronaldo. He’s determined to play for Brazil again and regrets the weight gain that would have made Homer proud.
It’s bad enough that another younger, better looking player takes your place but also taking your name? That’s some straight up cold shit.
Brazilian striker Ronaldo put on so much weight while he was injured this year that he was running out of clothes that fit him, he said on Tuesday.
“I couldn’t have got any fatter, I was running out of clothes,” Ronaldo said in an interview with the Sportv cable television station.
The former world great has been rehabbing with Flamengo and getting back in fighting shape. That’s bullshit. He was well on his way to Diego Maradona proportions before this ridiculous rehab/weight loss program.
Doesn’t he realize he could have gotten disability in addition to whatever payments he would have received from AC Milan and insurance? Now he has to fight his way back into national team contention with some half-ass team like Manchester City or Livorno. Maybe Mallorca would take him. Just keep him away from the buttered bull balls and buttermilk paella.
The Barca-Espanyol derby may not be as well known as Inter-Milan, Boca-River Plate or Celtic-Rangers however you can bet the Barcelona face-off is big time in Spain. I’m not sure why I listed Celtic-Rangers. The Guardian’s Barry Glendenning once described the Scottish derby as “two pygmies fighting over who’s taller”.
The latest edition of the Barcelona derby kicked off on Saturday with the two teams battling it out on the pitch while their supporters got it on in the stands. The match was stopped after flares were thrown onto Espanyol supporters in the lower deck of Espanyol’s Olympic Stadium and all hell broke loose. In case you don’t think that’s a big deal, check this video from an Espanyol supporters section. Start at :40. You also get a bonus Spanish lesson. Use it at your local bodgea, cockfight or amateur midget rodeo and make new friends!
The match resumed and Barca pulled back two goals against 10-man Espanyol for a 2-1 win.
I don’t know why the fans are getting so worked up. It’s not like someone tried to throw a scooter on them from the upper deck Milan-style. Seriously, that’s some scary shit right there.
Years ago I was at a Brazilian derby match in Belo Horizonte which pitted Cruzeiro against Atletico Mineiro. Consider that I started the day walking into an Atletico bar wearing Cruziero colors. Sometimes playing the stupid American saves your life. So does leaving with utmost haste. The stadium itself had a moat surrounding the field to keep fans out and we were blocked in our section Yankee-Gestapo style by military police with german shepards. Some of the scenes from the upper deck were terrifying yet amazing. Police dogs and batons on fans, flares flying, people pissing where they stood and fighting. However there was also incredible camaraderie, endless singing and chanting as well as new levels of inebriation I didn’t know were possible.
Would I do it again? In a second. A big time derby is something every soccer fan should try to do in their lifetime. LA Galaxy vs. Chivas USA does not count. Think about it as a Soccer Hajj with multiple destination options. Just try to avoid the flares and flying bags of piss whenever you get where you end up.
Rasheed Wallace is known for being an ejection magnet. His ability to attract technicals and flagrants knows no bounds. He could be one of the most prolific athletes when comes to getting bounced. Botafogo’s Andre Luis might have something to say about that.
Luis was sent off after receiving a second yellow for a foul. Instead of leaving peacefully, he flipped off the crowd, kicked a bottle into the stands, rumbled with the riot police causing his teammates to get involved and was re-arrested only after the police had to use batons and pepper spray on him and his fellow players.
Nice to see the coppers have time for an interview while beating and arresting players. Cops em Brasil could be a hit. The bar has just been raised, Sheed.