Dockett keeps the Fart Box in shape with regular workouts, protein shakes and fiber.

If you didn’t have enough reasons to pull for the Cardinals this Sunday, here’s one more. Defensive tackle Darnell Dockett’s nickname is Fart Box.

“He takes these protein shakes where he’s trying to keep himself healthy, but when it comes out we all suffer,” [nose tackle Bryan] Robinson said. “It’s nasty.”

There’s so much going on in that quote and it’s way too early. We’d hate to be around Fart Box when he’s not trying to keep himself healthy. He’s probably as deadly as Lake Nyos. Let’s hope Heath Miller gets some of that on Sunday.

Source: East Valley Tribune via PFT

I can’t believe it. Hope and change have gone out the window. Forget everything we said about enjoying the moment. I’m as speechless as John Boehner when he runs out of tobacco lobbyist money on the House floor. (Dickipedia) President Obama is supporting the Steelers in the Super Bowl.

Aw hell naw is right. In the words of the president himself, “It’s an outrage!” Supporting the Steelers doesn’t not inspire hope and change. Doesn’t Obama know that the Cardinals have Jesus on their side because Kurt Warner says so? If you say that I’m not pleased about this because I hate the Steelers, you would be correct. I am a non-purple camo pants wearing Ravens fan. However I despise them more because they played with our patron saint Najeh Trenadious Monté Davenport’s emotions by constantly cutting and resigning him. That’s some cold shit right there. Dookie should be tearing it up Ybor City with Chris Berman this week. I don’t know what it’s like to root for the Cardinals. No one does except Will Leitch and Neil Lomax’s mom. Maybe David Boston. However I’m going to see how it goes on Sunday.

Here’s hoping Hines Ward or Willie Parker get caught with a mercenary hooker from Reno a day before the game. If the Cardinals win, they should present a jersey to Vice-President Biden unless Obama makes him back the Steelers too. Wait he’s from Scranton. There’s always Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano. DHS probably has a broom closet or handicapped bathroom stall they could use for the ceremony.

Stupid Ravens. Only if they still had Stoney Case or Elvis Grbac.

This is. The Steelers gutted the Chargers yesterday in the final playoff game of the weekend. The conference championship rounds are set, Philadelphia/Arizona and Baltimore/Pittsburgh. If defense wins championships, I think the deck is stacked for whomever wins the AFC to win the Super Bowl. Not to sleep on Philadelphia’s defense, but it is no comparison to Baltimore or Pittsburgh’s tenacious D. I think I would want to see Arizona’s high flying offense square off against the AFC brutes. That might make for an interesting Super Bowl Sunday…or a completely one-sided affair like most Super Bowls have been.

Dave Meggett: We make sacred pact. I promise teach hooker pickup to you, you promise learn. I say, you do, no questions.

Richie Anderson: Bet.

The only thing that would make that exchange better would be You’re The Best Around playing in the background.

Richie Anderson executed the equivalent of the crane kick on Thursday when he was arrested for solicitation after attempting to court an undercover police officer with a jar full of laundry quarters.

Ken Wisenhunt already has to be wondering whether taking the Arizona job was the right move. The first hint might have been the stadium named after a university that only exists online like Tron.

I guess the cop wasn’t who Richie thought she was. Crown his dumb ass.