By the way: have you voted for Jacquelyn yet?  Seriously, we don’t get a lot of pretty ladies in this place.  Be our wingman.  Show us some love.

“Love him or hate him, Trump is a man who is certain about what he wants and sets out to get it, no holds barred. Women find his power almost as much of a turn-on as his money.”

“When I build something for somebody, I always add $50 million or $60 million onto the price. My guys come in, they say it’s going to cost $75 million. I say it’s going to cost $125 million, and I build it for $100 million. Basically, I did a lousy job. But they think I did a great job.”

“All of the women on The Apprentice flirted with me – consciously or unconsciously. That’s to be expected.”

-Donald Trump Read the rest of this entry

When we last left Washington Redskins defensive Jabba the Hut Albert Haynesworth he was ingratiating himself to motorists of the greater Washington, D.C. area, a lofty group. Now it appears that another young lady, a server for the W Hotel, has decided to unfairly target Haynesworth for her fifteen minutes of fame.

Now, before you start bringing up previous incidents and trying to paint a picture, you need to know that Big Al has a sensitive side. Big Al knows that waitressing is a tireless, and thankless, profession, so when the opportunity presented itself to subject a waitress to humiliating attention during what was no doubt the tail end of a grueling shift, he just couldn’t let opportunity pass him by. Ladies love attention, fellas.

Leave 20 percent and then please just leave Washington Post:

The report said Haynesworth, identified as Subject 1, tried to give the waitress his credit card and asked if he could place it in her blouse. The waitress nodded, and Haynesworth placed the card into her blouse and began caressing her breast, the report says.

While Haynesworth is not named in the report, the police department source, who spoke on condition of anonymity, confirmed that Subject 1 referred to the Redskins lineman. The report, which was filed at 5:15 a.m. Sunday, describes the suspect as a “heavy/fat/stocky” black male with a goatee, and about 6 feet 6 or 6 feet 7.

Whoah! Whoah! Let’s not jump to any conclusions here, Washington D.C. police department. I mean a 6’7″ “stocky black male driving a Maserati (guessing) could be just about anybody in this fair city.

Call me crazy but I think once the facts come out D.C’s finest will all owe Big Al an apology. Haynesworth, 1. Washington D.C. Police Department, 0.

Former aerobics instructor turned Zuffa Lottery winner Dana White has a habit of shooting his mouth off. He also has a habit of burning fighters. To many, his comments are refreshing in an age where athletes and promoters are actively encouraged to say nothing and offend no one, an impossible feat unless you’re Will Smith or somebody like that. To others, White represents a somewhat tired act of ingratitude, and his relationships with his fighters have run the entire spectrum of love and hate. So you basically want to give him a hug but then start to strangle him, like most of my sexual encounters.

Given what we already know, just take a guess what happened after Fedor got pounded in the cage last week and White had his smart phone (Now with 4G!) to tweet about it:

With plenty of longtime mixed martial arts fans on the emotional edge following the beatdown of Fedor Emelianenko, there was one man who was fired up to see the Russian go down in flames. Minutes after Fedor fell badly at the hands of Antonio Silva, Dana White hit Twitter, posted a smiley face and then opened up the blowtorch.
Longtime Fedor backers and fans of PRIDE were bent and White stirred the pot. He threw out barbs like “M-Done” for M-1 and “VaDummy” for Vadim Finkelchtein, Fedor’s manager.

Twitter is terrific because athletes and celebrities can muse about all kinds of topics, most of which they know so little about that to even try to debate them would be a waste of time. This is not one of those times. Fedor chased quick paydays and tomato can opponents and built a reputation as the baddest heavyweight fighter walking the planet. Eventually everybody in MMA is going to go down. It’s like when you buy your girl diamonds…they pretty much have to.

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls we have a treat for you today. Welcome to Captain Morgan 2011 BracketMaster Challenge, presented by Spike.com!  What we have here is a a battle between 32 gorgeous Morganettes in a tournament to see who can be the #1 Morganette of them all.  We have signed up to participate in this affair because dammit the above pictured Jacquelyn needs our help to win and who are we to turn down a beautiful woman in distress?

Also, one of our readers could be the one to win the grand prize $15,000 prize package, which includes cash and the ultimate home theater equipped with an HDTV, surround sound system, sports ticker, fridge and furniture. Not a bad deal huh?

Here’s the deal, Jacquelyn is from Denver, CO and participating in the WEST division of the BracketMaster Challenge. Besides being absolutely gorgeous, she actually is a very cool girl.  Seriously, watch the video below and you’ll see for yourself.  We’d love to make this happen for her so we are asking your help and in turn you could win a boatload of goodies for your trouble.

What we need is for you, our faithful readers, to head on over to bracketmaster.spike.com and VOTE for JACQUELYN in the WEST division. If you want the best chance to win the $15,000 grand prize package and to get Jacquelyn to the top, you have to make sure to go to bracketmaster.spike.com to fill out brackets EVERY SINGLE DAY.

The Deuce thinks Jacquelyn has what it takes to win the top spot of this challenge so don’t let her down.  Don’t let us down.  Most of all…don’t let yourself down!  Vote Jacquelyn today!!

Full Disclosure: This is a sponsored post by Captain Morgan and Spike TV. You can all call us sellouts now if you want.

Remember the time when you could kill two people and get away with it? O.J. Simpson probably wonders what happened to the good old days. People celebrated like they won something. Hell, we threw a “The Juice is Loose” party. (Mostly because we wanted a reason to throw a party and drink an absurd number of screwdrivers.) Now he can’t even talk about getting laid without having his ass handed to him.

The National Enquirer is reporting that a white supremacist jumped OJ in the prison yard and beat him to “a bloody pulp”. Apparently he was bragging that he banged more white women than Bryant Gumbel and Quincy Jones combined. Bad move, Nordberg.

Unknown to the former NFL star, The Juice has been a marked man behind bars ever since white supremacists overheard him brag about his sexual conquests of beautiful white women.

“Unfortunately for O.J., a group of young skinhead punks were within earshot – and they were enraged,” Simpson’s former business partner Bruce Fromong told The ENQUIRER in an exclusive blockbuster interview.

Inmates cheered as a muscular young skinhead knocked him to the ground, punching and kicking him to a bloody pulp and inflicting injuries so severe he secretly spent nearly three weeks in the infirmary before he recovered.

The humiliating beating left 63-year-old Simpson in agony – and threw him into a spiral of depression so deep that he’s now afraid to venture out of his cell, divulge sources.

You know you’re the most popular guy on the yard when everyone gets behind a skinhead beating up a black guy. Too bad Al Cowlings wasn’t there to take the beating for him. “Nooo! Hit me instead!”

OJ should have taken a cue from Julio Iglesias and Willie Nelson.

Now that’s as smooth as a warm jug of Carlo Rossi. Even skinheads can get with that. Well maybe not Julio but definitely Willie. Can’t we all just get along, guy with the swastika carved in your forehead?