Do you know who I am? Uh oh! What What What What!

There ain’t no party like a J-Kidd party cause a J-Kidd party don’t stop. You probably thought it couldn’t get worse than Kobe on the mic. Check the J-Kidd flow on this Jason Kidd track from 1994′s B-Ball’s Best Kept Secret featuring Money B from Digital Underground.

On second thought, Kobe’s still the worst that comes to mind but J-Kidd’s not much better. B-Ball’s Best Kept Secret has tunes that will never die. Songs such as Funk in the Trunk by J.R. Rider, Lost in the Sauce by the late Malik Sealy and Livin’ Legal and Large by The Glove.

What’s that? You want to borrow my copy? No, my brother. You got to get your own.

Leave it to the Indians to find new ways to abandon a sporting event. Monkeys riding elephants and chasing tigers onto the pitch, a Muslim-Hindu battle royale or simply landing a helicopter in the middle of a cricket match.

A helicopter sent players and officials running for cover after it landed in the middle of a cricket game. The piloit mistook a painted “H” in the corner of the field for a target. He also thought a nearby fire were smoke signals intended for him.

The game was continued after 30 minutes which gave the home team time to cork their cricket bats, take a tea break or do whatever it is you do during breaks.

Hopefully you weren’t forced to sit through the gay Super Bowl on Sunday. Before you get all pissy, we also realize that the NBA All-Star game is the black man’s Super Bowl. We’ll take suggestions on the Asian and Latino Super Bowls.

This is tangentially sports-related but it doesn’t matter. Mickey Rourke’s acceptance speech from the Independent Spirit Awards was phenomenal. Here’s video courtesy of FilmDrunk. Some NSFW language.

If people gave speeches like this more often, I’d pay attention to these Hollywood circle jerks. Fortunately they don’t which means I can dedicate my time to raising fighting koalas and watching movies like Milk, the story about gay cows and their fight for suffrage or something like that. I don’t know how Sean Penn played a cow so well but that’s method acting for you.

You know a small part of you felt for stupid Flanders when his wife Maude was taken out by a t-shirt gun. Don’t feel bad about feeling more sympathy for a cartoon character than this Palmeiras fan who takes himself out.

All this video needs is the sad saxophone playing while the guy lies face down on the pavement. “Saxamaphone”. Maybe the tv show could use the loser music from the Price is Right. That makes every tragic situation hilarious.