If it’s not making monkey noises at African players during soccer matches, making fun of Chinese facial features during the Olympics or wearing blackface to racially insult Lewis Hamilton, it’s just not Spain.

You can always count on the Spanish to do something horrifically racist while screaming that they aren’t racist as much as you can count on the sun rising and setting. Someone in Spain has set up a website called “Burst Hamilton’s Tire” in English that “encourages visitors to leave ‘virtual nails’ on a mock-up of the Brazilian racetrack where he hopes to win the drivers’ championship this Sunday”.

A nice feature of the website allows fans to leave comments and they haven’t disappointed.

More than 16,000 racist messages using terms like “nigger” and “half-breed” have been posted on a Spanish website.

One, calling himself David, left a message saying: “—- you ——-. Monkey.”

Another, dubbed Hamilton a conguito – a type of chocolate sweet with racist overtones – and wrote: “Conguito, you are going to die.”

One message on the site, from a man calling himself Carrillo, says: ‘Half-breed, kill yourself in your car.’

Another, from ‘Alberto’, says: ‘I hope you run over your dad in the first pit stop, Hamilton.

Let’s not leave out the messages calling for Hamilton to kill himself.

It’s not clear what’s more amazing about the phenomenon of racism in Spanish sport. Is it the acts of racism or the absolute denials of it by the Spanish? Cesc Fabregas, Rudy Fernandez and Pau Gasol among others have all come out denying that the Spanish are racist. Not once have we seen any athlete or person in charge of sport condemn the acts of racism that are almost too many to count. One would think Spanish basketball players that ply their trade in the NBA or soccer players who play on multi-national club teams would be a bit more sensitive to racism but then again we’re not dealing with astrophysicists here.

Don’t count on the sporting associations such as F1, FIFA or UEFA to do anything. They’re too busy rollin’ like playboys and coming down on countries and teams they don’t like. Even when they punish teams, the fines are laughable or they reverse themselves as seen in the Athletico Madrid-Liverpool Champions League match this season. UEFA banned the match from being played in Madrid after racist taunts during the Athletico-Marseille match but they reversed themselves and the game went on as scheduled.

Nothing will change until Spain is held to account and they are made to suffer by taking away sporting events and imposing heavy fines and bans. Here’s to Hamilton winning the title and destroys the field in the process. Hopefully, he’ll follow that up by dumping whatever tranny he’s dating from the Pussycat Girls and finds himself a nice girl like that Gabrielle Union. Gabby will give it up to any athlete any time, anywhere. That girl fine! I’d tell Gabby about my college lacrosse career but I just can’t deal with having Jason Kidd’s sloppy seconds. There have to be some sports blogger status hoes out there. We’ve not above getting some Bill Cosby/Sebastian Janikowski time in with you. What’s that? No, baby. That’s not a roofie. Email us at the Deuce if you’re in the mood for some sexual healing. Chimp’s off the market. Sorry, no hot monkey love for you.

There’s not much like a lazy afternoon rugby match between two inconsequential island nations. New Zealand and the Cook Island are the kind of places you end up due to a shipwreck or plane crash. The two countries decided to see who could out-Haka who before their match and hilarity ensued

Check the two players at the bottom of the picture who hug and walk off as though nothing is going on behind them. At least the Cook Islands guy went back. The New Zealand player had his team’s back. Way back.

One would think the Cook Islands team would be on their knees crying as though they were saved. “Please, we were eating each other! No man should get used to the taste of another human…well, depending on the circumstances.”

Japan never ceases to amaze me with what they do with sport. Watch this guy launch baseballs with his nunchuck skills. Badass.

This is what 25 years of joy denied looks like.

Forget Times Square.

Cottman and Frankford is where it’s at, baby.

I don’t even KNOW these people! But we were all out there, hugging and high-fiving each other like there’s no tomorrow.

Of course, there is tomorrow, and we will celebrate. And then, oh my and then, there is noon on Friday and that march down Broad Street.

The pure, unadulterated joy of a city.

What do they dump on the winning coach in the Israeli Football League? Our guess is hummus or Manichewitz. Coach is gonna have one wicked hangover now that the Kraft family and the Israeli Football League have combined like Voltron to form the Kraft Family IFL. Those Tel Aviv vs. Ramallah games will be must see TV for sure.

I guess I shouldn’t bring my buttermilk infused-steaks to the tailgates like I do here.