Clown Converts To Judaism And Gets A Knighthood
What the hell can you say? As a youth soccer coach from Tenneessee said today, Steve McClaren better be going to temple tonight. England have no business still being in contention for a place in Euro 2008 but somehow they’re still in the hunt. Israel pulled off an upset and defeated Russia 2-1 with an injury time goal by Omer Golan. The result eliminated Russia and only requires England to get one point from their match with Croatia on Wednesday to advance to next year’s finals. Hebrew Nationals and He’brews all around.
England still live in spite of McClown’s best effort to sabotage any chance England had of winning this Wednesday. England played a friendly against Austria on Friday and Michael Owen started even though the squad’s striker situation was precarious. Like the lame horse he is, Owen went down and is out for Wednesday’s crucial match. His absence leaves the one and only Crouchigol as the lone option.
If England wins, the papers will start screaming about an England win next summer and glory for the queen. McClown will get a knighthood even before the tournament along with a contract extension until 2491.
In other Euro 2008 news, Italy slid through to the finals on a dodgy call as they beat a resilient Scotland 2-1. I was pulling for a Scotland win to go along with a Russian win. It would have been great to see the Scots win and England go out. The Scots would never let them live it down. However, a few English friends pointed out that an England win on Wednesday means less hooligans in London next summer so it’s a must-win.
Here are your other results.
Finland 2 – Azerbaijan 1
Spain 3 – Sweden 0
Northern Ireland/Fulham 1 – Denmark 0 (That’s gotta hurt, Vilhelm)
Poland 2 – Belgium 1
Portugal 1 – Armenia 0 (Allegations of a massacre are highly exaggerated)
Greece 5 – Malta 0
Turkey 2 – Norway 0
Lithuania 2 – Ukraine 0
Wales 2 – Ireland 2
Germany 4 – Cyprus 0
Moldova 3 – Hungary 0
Czech Republic 3 – Slovakia 1
Macedonia 2 – Croatia 0
Latvia 4 – Liechtenstein 0
Bulgaria 1 – Romania 0
Albania 2 – Belarus 4 (Albania did win most number of stolen watches)
Netherlands 1 – Luxembourg 0
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